Reply To: college='OTD'

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#825690
A Heimishe Mom
Participant

It is hard for your parents to accept the new realities of life.

I think step number one when you, as an adult, are at odds with your parents is to seek out Daas Torah. College is not a must, but it is definitely a lot harder to find a job without it. There are also many professions which require certificate programs rather than 4 year college. If your parents can’t or won’t foot the bill you would have to take out loans.

Their one hope and nachas is to see you married off. This is also an issue about which to seek out Daas Torah. Boys and girls or being pushed into dating far too young. You need to be able to establish a form of parnassah, and perhaps a bit of savings, first. That said, once you are married it will be easier to qualify for financial assitance as you will be able to file as independant of your parents. BUT going to school and having babies don’t really work too well together, especially if you need to work to put food on the table. It is easier if you are the husband, but still hard.

And as to College=OTD that is really not true. Although there are many parents who do believe it, (and menahelim and roshei yeshiva that perpetuate it) you will find few “older singles” who haven’t moved on to receive some form of formal higher education. Either as something to do with their times, or as a means to further their careers. Being a copy girl or preschool assistant for 10K a year is not very fulfilling after a couple of years.