Reply To: Platonic Relationships

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#810088
aries2756
Participant

lovinghalacha, you didn’t mention if the two of you are of marriageable age. If you are then you should come clean with your parents and see if the feelings are real enough and strong enough to make it to the Chupah.

If you are NOT marriageable age, you should come clean to your parents and allow them to guide you away from each other before you do things you will regret. You are both going to get hurt and you want to minimize the hurt to the degree that you wont be hurting each other. Look for comfort from those that can offer it to you without causing any harm to either of you. Don’t confide in friends who can wind up being yentas and spread your story and also add salt and pepper to your story and fuel to the fire. Be as quiet and discreet as possible. Keep “damage control” in mind. I am sorry that is my advise I know it hurts to think about breaking up, but unless you come from a very modern society where dating at a young age is not frowned upon I don’t see any way around it.

There is one other way I can think of. If you come from a very Frum background and you come clean with both sets of parents and they agree to this shidduch, then you will have to abide by the rules they set up for you. Basically that would have to be something on the guidelines of not being alone with one and other and always having a chaperone along with you so you abide by the rules of negiah and Yichud.