OP: I’ll leave the advice part to the other CR folks, but just wanted to wish you Hatzlacha. One thing, you’re a human being with normal emotions and take time for whatever emotional healing may be necessary.
A relationship to opposite genders is never platonic unless you are a Toievanik!
I always wondered about that… (Joking. Not that such things are funny.)
As Rabbi Wallerstein says, until you have a ring on your finger, and a kesubah in your hand, you have nothing.
Good quote. Was that from the magic touch Shiur? (OP, thats a great Shiur btw, you may want to give a listen.)