I know how hard it can be to daven. For me the hardest part is (a) allocating that looming amount of time to it and (b) actually getting yourself up out of that warm cozy bed to do it.
So I suggest you try something like this: Decide that from now on, you’re going to say Shma in the morning. That’s all you have to do. It’s short, so you don’t have to convince yourself to dedicate time to it, and you can also do it while sitting, so you can technically just sit up and say it at the edge of your bed in your pajamas. Just saying Shma should be a way to do it without that intimidation davening can have. You don’t even have to wake up early. Just tell yourself that that much you can do, that that much you really want to try to do, and set your mind to it. Just Shma. But while you’re saying it, if you feel you can, try thinking about the different kavanos you’re supposed to have – with Hashem meaning rachamim, as well as adnus and haya hove v’yihiye, and Elokeinu meaning din, and echad meaning those two coming together, and all the other myriad of things echad can mean (being all-encompassing, being all-important, etc.) Put real thought into it. The important thing is for you to feel that you’re doing something meaningful, and when you understand what you’re saying you can help it become meaningful. And hopefully, if you do this for long enough, you can train/bring your mind to be more open to the thought of davening, and then maybe you can start taking on more of the davening at some later point.
The idea is not to push yourself. Hopefully just saying Shma will not be intimidating enough and you’ll be able to carry through with it. You do want to daven. It’s not that you don’t. You tried to set your alarm to get yourself to do it, so you really are trying. But trying to force yourself to just get up and daven after so many years of not davening is just too huge of a jump. You have to ease into it slowly. Ease into it, get yourself accustomed to what it’s like again, and once you can see (vs just imagine) that davening really isn’t so bad, only then can you attempt to do more. But for now, WHATEVER you do is AMAZING. Don’t let your yetzer hara talk you into an all-or-nothing mentality, because as you’ve seen yourself, that way you end up with the “nothing”.
I hope this helped a bit, good luck!