Reply To: Divorced and Remarried Woman–didn't cut her losses

Ms. Critique-

…Another reason for her attitude is perhaps jealousy, assuming the first husband went on with his life and living a normal life ….

Husband #1 definitely did better the second time around and doesn’t have to blantantly advertise it. He is adored and respected by his second wife’s entire immediate and extended family.

I may not be quoting this entirely correctly, but I had heard that a person merits their zivug rishon according to one’s mazal and a zivug sheini according to one’s deeds. So there are situations where one eventually gets what’s coming to them although the road to get to that point is very long and winding. I imagine that in this particular instance husband #1 got more of what he deserved in a second wife.

Imaofthree–not discussing an EX in a bad light is a very difficult standard to undertake, but the payoff is priceless. Your friend who undertook this definitely deserves a lot of respect. Taking the high-road is virtuous!!

As for help/therapy–my experience is that there are people who strive for improvement and others who are shallow, in denial, and are so full of themselves that there is no room in their lives for anything but themselves and the drama they create. They wallow in their mire and emit toxicity like a contagious disease. Those types almost never seek help–how unfortunate that sometimes the people who need therapy the most are the ones who are oblivious to it or think they are above it.