i…GAH! its threads and stories like these that have framed my opinions on the whole shidduch scene. as i said in another thread (one i started) the whole process has become so industrialized. “he is from here here and here and shes from there there and there…he went to school X she went to school at Y his family is Z hers is A must be a perfect match!”
im sorry but i must object. why cant it just be about 2 people who like each other? maybe im being a bit naive or maybe ive just been influenced by teh american media…but i think the cookie cutter approach to shadchanus is disgusting. it shouldnt be about teh families or the money or the yichus or whatever…i mean seriously. youre choosing the person with whom you will build a family and spend your life, it shouldnt be brought down to extraneous variables. the families arent marrying, the boy and girl are. leave teh families and circumstances out of it.
another thing that always annoys me is the way people are all for kiruv…until its their son or daughter marrying teh product of said kiruv. teh way baalei teshuva are treated in shidduchim is absolutely disgusting. teh NIMBY approach taken to these wonderful people is so hurtful. i would be proud to marry a baalas teshuva.
gah…ive ranted about this many times before but it still gets me. especially since its going to be relevant to me in 2 or 3 years. i dont care how it was done in europe, i dont care what the tradition is, i dont care how shadchanim have been doing it for hundreds of years, the system is ridiculous. its self completely self serving and not acting in teh best interests of prospective couples.