bombmaniac, I also believe that although it is good that you could AT LEAST vent to us, this is not enough. I hope that you can love yourself enough to find a good therapist where you can vent your feelings and speak freely so you don’t carry around the pain and hurt of your childhood for the rest of your life. This is real heavy baggage that can really drag you down in marriage and in many other aspects of a happy and successful future.
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