the goq – yeah, i hate when people make both of those problems just women issues; people don’t realize that there are tons of older boys/men single and suffering, and that men suffer just as much with infertility issues and the pain of not having children.
it’s very difficult for shalom bayis these issues.
on other hand, i think, everyone gave great answers – treat person as normal and don’t probe. and if they give you some info. – take it, and don’t probe for more.
also, if do have one child – don’t ask if now they don’t have any more issues, or what was the problem, etc.
if you do have money, can definitely offer financial help in nice way – or through an organization or something to give them the help, can be quite costly – not just IVF.