Heavy topic, Feif.
Like you, I had my share of bad raps (some really bad in fact).
What gave me loads of nechomah is the fact that I’ve come full circle and in many cases not only proved the nay-sayers and critics wrong, I’ve even acheived success beyond the wildest expectations.
One example: I ran into trouble as a teen and the wife of the decision maker who sealed my doom way back then, is now in charge of the school that my son goes to, considered one of the “better” bklyn schools. Wether or not she told her husband that the teen he busted and tossed out into the cold (and he would have protected me, if I had enough famliy connections) now has a charming child in a top school is irrelevant. The fact is, I KNOW.
Another example: many of my grade-school years biggest tormentors (yes, my growing up years were anything but fun) are now in no position to laugh at me or anyone for that matter. Either messed up families, kids, finacials, in / just out of jail. Whatever the case, I’M ABOVE ALL THIS JUNK, so who’s the winner, now that its in my past?
Bottom line, you turned the corner and got past it by coming back and making a go of it, despite the bad past you endured. Don’t bother facing your rebbie; your current (and future) success is the best revenge!
Be strong, and continued hatzlocha!
Mischiefmaker – Wow do I feel for you. I’ve been in this seat before, so I know how bad it hurts. The fact that you wrestle with this each Rosh Hashonah shows just how big a person you are (despite your age). All I can say to you is with time, you will achieve bigger and better things and this will no longer hurt as bad. I had one incident where a camp cheated me out of $, and I can tell you, at the time (to a teen) it was a fortune. Know what? I earn that much now in a few days. Doesnt make it right, but it doesnt hurt as bad as it did then. And best of all? I’m still here, striving and succeding, and those ganivim? Who gives a hoot. I’m sure they got what they dished.
At any rate, threads like this is what makes all the shtism in the CR worthwhile. Once we hear we are not alone, we move on feeling a little bit better.
Hatzlocha to you too!