So, you are advocating someone become an achzar and ignore a takanas chachamim to take care of his children? (the chiyuv to support his wife is an independent chiyuv which is not even discussed in the Rambam here). Do you think the Rambam you cite advocates doing that? Is there is section of the Rambam or do any of the nosei keilim add, “aval lilmod torah, hakol shari”?
I dont have a gemara kiddushin in front of me. Can you please give a mareh makom so that I can see it later? Rashi or tosfos diveri hamaschil…….? Another Rishon on the daf? Thanks.