My motto is “make your marriage work for the sake of the children” if there is no way “make your divorce work for the sake of the children”.
Many parents forget that their first obligation is the children and their attitude is “don’t I deserve….” the answer is “NO”. The kids deserve 2 parents who play fair, 2 parents who put their needs above their own, etc. 2 people decide to get married and have kids. Once you bring kids into the picture they have to be the top priority. YOU DO what you have to for the sake of the kids. If that means giving up or giving in thats what you do. If it means counseling thats what you do. YOU do whatever it takes to bring Shalom Bayis into your home for the sake of the kids. If it means giving up your “so called good friends who mean well” or even moving to another community you do whatever it takes to keep your family together.
In this “ME” generation everyone puts their own needs before the children and it has had a devastating effect on our youth. It should be pounded into the heads of all marriageable age adults. If you marry and bring children into this world your first obligation is your kids. Do not take advice from your friends. Do not allow your friends into your marriage. Don’t listen to anyone that tells you what YOU deserve. Think about what your kids deserve. Keep working together with your spouse to make a safe and happy environment for your kids.
There are so many couples who jumped into divorce only to realize when the dust settled that it was the worst decision they had made. Why did they rush into it, who advised them to do it? It isn’t any better now so what was the rush, they aren’t happier outside the marriage, maybe they could have worked on it.
Divorce is not always the answer it is just another set of problems.