cofeefan:
I understand you clearly and I feel for you and all the other single girls (that’s why i have spent so much time over the last three years working on the issue).
I don’t like the idea and I wouldn’t encourge individual girls to pay to meet. But as has been mentioned in this thread it’s a free economy. A shadchan is well within their rights to ask for a fee to meet with a single and the single has the option to accept or decline. I would reccomened that if the single accept there should be a clear understanding of what the single can expect as a result of the meeting, but in all liklyhood they will become another person that the shadchan genuinely tries for. Unfourtanately the reality is that shadchanim can not possibly cater to everyone in their files.
To be clear those that charge to meet (and I’m not a advocate) is NOT because they are making it a business, it is by and large the groups of shadchanim and they have overhead that they need to cover to enable them to attempt to help as many singles as possible. They need to pay for their computer systems, electricity, software. Some of the shadchanim in these groups get small salaries, etc. Who is supposed to cover this?
Thus they charge for the meeting. This is a fair explantion, but in my mind not a sound practice.