dear clever –
your story and the pain with it pierces to the core.
It truly is a story of galus, the distance between us and Hashem, as much as we want to be close, there is more and more that distances us.
It is true that your loneliness makes you feel that your situation has set you apart. But as you aptly noted, many others feel that way each due to their own situation.
BTW – there are plenty of yeshivish people, chassidish people… who are not treated right. There is a reason that the Bais Hamikdash isn’t here, yet.
Wonderful people in the above posts made beautiful suggestions on how to get back to Hashem. You can do this, and once you do, you will find that it is only this connection that any body really “has” in this world.
May you truly be zocheh to reconnecting with Hashem, and may your life be a fulfillment of “Samchainu Keyimos Inisonu”