mdd: Real life can be pretty frustrating when we try to fight it, no?
AishesChayil:
Personal experience with accepting reality has taught me that it’s the best way to go. At eighteen, I imagined the type of husband I wanted and realized that his Mommy would have a list of 50, and chances of my being at the top were probably slimmer than me (and I wasn’t fat), so I searched for this same top bochur, but with a (moral) BT background. I certainly did not feel that I was “settling”; after all, if his parents were frum, would I have made it to the top of their list?
What a loss of all these years it might have been had I chosen to fight the system and only now, years later, “settled” for a BT.