SOME1ELSE2:
Thank you for speaking out about this. I also sometimes go to the park on L and 17th though I try to avoid that park for the most part — but I have seen these ridiculous babysitters you speak about and my heart just aches. I want to scream, I want to take these children away from them… but then what?? What can I do?? As a mother I can’t imagine leaving my child with a goy, let alone the kind of low-class disinterested people these are. You can see how much they are interested in these children by looking at their expressionless faces.
I have to say that there is a “nice” goy in my building and she has helped me with my children on occasion WHILE I WAS HOME COOKING, finishing up work (I work from home) ETC.. But I have used her sparingly …because when she enters the sanctity of our mikdash miat is disturbed — although my children are little they can feel it. I personally would not want to look at her for any length of time, why should I be so insensitive to think that my children’s neshamos are not uncomfortable by her presence.
However, sometimes two hands are just simply not enough, and I have used frum babysitters in the past — although they are not all neccessary good or as frum as they claim to be when you first meet them… There are many issues.
I know that it is a very unpopular notion these days, but… I believe you should sacrifice everything you can in order for your children to have YOU (or your husband) or another family member like a grandmother, for example, with them at all their waking(and sleeping) hours. I don’t believe that children should just be occupied with something, BUT they deserve to be loved, taught, nurtured, kissed, hugged, laughed with. They deserve to build a relationship with YOU. I heard something so sad one day. A little boy maybe of two yrs. old calling his babysitter “Mommie”, and the babysitter saying “No, Moishe, I am not your mommy!” Our Yiddishe kindelach are the most precious treasure we have and although it is hard to make ends meet — it is the case for many families especially these days– it is my humble opinion that we must make many sacrifices. There are people crying and davening to have children and beg Hashem to give them such a bracha. I know because I was one of those people. Hashem gave us children so we can raise them OURSELVES, put into them all the love we have…NOT hire goim to do our job. Goim can clean our house, that’s it.