They are not fooling themselves, they are fooling the schools. You can also be selective with the TV and the internet. You can also put parental locks on the tv and locks on the cable boxes. You can also put locks on your bedroom doors, etc. You can also rent a dvd player ONLY when you rent a Jewish video or dvd.
Schools should also MIND their own business and put some faith and trust in the parents. They should have more communication with the parents and less rules. There should be more conferences and workshops with parents and with parents together with kids and less rules and chumras. Work on midos tovos for all involved and stop telling parents what they can and can’t do. Work together as a team to produce the happiest and most productive and successful yiddishe neshomos. Stop forcing parents and kids to lie. Stop raising the bar so that everyone just walks under it instead of aspiring to reach it.