I would like to add a personal thought related especially to the Chareidi-Yeshiviish world, especially in EY, both of which I’m a part of. A large percentage of those around me live in a virtual reality, a facade, a phony self.
Some stay in Kollel because it looks good, including pressure from some peoples wifes. Some leave Kollel for the same reason. Some dress modern Yeshiviish, frumy, etc., all to satisfy the way they deal with society. I have a former talmid who is a big Baal Mosed, without the minimaal amount of Yiras Shamayim to be doing anything directly related to Chinuch.
Living as a phony is bound to cause friction. We really need to get back to the basics and start acting as our real selves.