mosherose-
i am in very close contact with my posek and i’ve seen many teshuvos about this, one is allowed to swim with ones wife. Period. End of story. Stop pushing chumrus on everyone. If you push too many chumrus… well learn from Adam harishon who assured everything about the eitz hadaas on chava, and were it lead to. You can follow chumrus for yourself, if your up to it but stop pushing it on everyone else.
that thing about chassidus and garb. it’s quite funny. i once had an argument with someone about who is “REALLY” chassidish. Either a bunch of young couples, almost shaved their beards… didn’t hold strong and tight to their hashkafa, only wore the levush… or someone who doesn’t wear the whole levush but is very shtark and strong in the hashgafos of his chassidus, more pnimius. i think today in general there’s way too much labeling. i got a call for shiduchim “so what would you say they are – haymish, chassidish, kalta litvak…” (i added kalta litvak) it’s disgusting! Were all here to serve Hashem, each follow the derech of their mesora till now, or how he feels he can grow closest to Hashem. Finish, genuk shoin with all this narishkeit. it’s all SO chitzoniusdik