Same source as above:
THREE CATEGORIES OF INFORMATION with regard to shidduchim:
#1 – Objective, Essential Information
This type of info falls under the category of “lo saamod al dam rayecha”. Provided that all the rules of lashon hora l’toeles are met, this info must not be witheld, and it must be volunteered even if you are not directly asked.
This type of info includes any faults that are detrimental to establishing a Jewish home, a happy maariage and wholesome relationship. Included is seriously flawed character traits, immodesty, lack of religious commitment, and definite health or emotional problems.
#2 – Subjective, Essential Information
This refers to middos, personality, intellect, age, learning, etc. = info that is important but not crucial. You must tell the truth if asked, but you don’t have to volunteer the info if not asked. Unless you are sure that what you have to share will be detrimental to building a happy Jewish home, then refrain from sharing that info until you can clarify the matter.
#3 – Unique, Personal Preferences
This includes minor issues that do not stand in the way of a happy marriage. Example provided: a young lady only wants to date someone who will share her love of music. If someone asks you about a young man, and you know that he does not love music, how do you respond? If asked directly about this, you may honestly respond, and this does not violate rechilus, even though the shidduch will most likely be nixed. You may not lie regarding this matter, however you may choose to refrain from answering the question if you think the shidduch still stands a good chance.