hello99:
“This does not seem to be true:”
Contact NASI they will show you the data thas has recently been culled from more than 29 girls HS across the country
Maturity:
their is no data that 23 year old boys marrying 22 year old girls instead of 19 year olds is causing shalom bayis issues. As for when boys start to date-that should be a decision the boys makes together with his parents (and mentor/rebbi) what it shouldn’t depend on is a system for when he comes back from EY. Some will start earlier, some later. All should start when it is right for the individual.
Jphone:
You are on the money!
Encouraging close in age shidduchim in general is the beginning of the answer -NOT the end. Clearly structural change is needed that will have boys dating SLIGHTLY younger and girls SLIGHTLY older. This is being worked on as we speak.
However every little bit helps. and has been helping in the last two years. Say what you want, the facts on the ground indicate that 23 year old boys are far more ready to consider dating girls their own age then they would have done in the past.
THAT is a VEYY positive move, if not a total solution.
As an aside, I’m not sure who your R”Y is, but the letter he signed clearly states “Ha’siba Ha’i’kari” (translated primary cause). Perhaps you didn’t understand what he told you.