Oomis, you forgot a few…
Neither of them has much experience dealing with members of the opposite sex. It’s hard to learn that while you’re also dealing with the stresses of a new family. The old custom of having the chosson-to-be move in with the kallah’s family for a year before the wedding at least got them used to each other in a controlled environment.
It’s difficult enough to be a young husband when you have the confidence of owning the roof over your head and knowing that you have provided for your family. When many depend on relatives, charity and the government for subsistence it shakes him in ways that go beyond religio and strike at the heart of being a man.
A woman who spends her whole life preparing for a wedding may find she’s unprepared for the reality of children, a man to look after and a family to support.