Devorah,
Which bakeries many of our local bakeries are kosher? What brand cheese? no defending the grilled cheese.
Nothing like wishing power uponn yourself;).
What you see as public disregard is on your level,- many people think a frum woman spending an hour on a laptop at starbucks isnt tzniuz, or proper behavior-. you have no interest in being mussared as evidenced by your rambling rationalization in your initial post so dont mussar others.