Bemused: Listen, I am not saying that there is no difference between friendly and flirting. Yes, there are times when friendly can become flirting. And of course that kind of behavior is inappropriate and dangerous. But you are saying that people in the CR are crossing the line. All I am saying is that I have not seen that here in the CR myself. And apparently there are other people, like haifagirl, who agree with me.
I don’t engage in the real-life scenarios which you have described above. And my husband and I do not go out with other couples. But then again, if my husband has a friend over, I will speak to him. And I may even make a joke. I just make sure that I never get even close to the line, let alone cross over it. I make sure never to give anyone the wrong impression.
A lot of people make this mistake, and think the internet gives carte blanche for all things considered highly inappropriate for their own everyday behavior, so long at it is “anonymous”. As long as someone has identified themselves by gender (sorry haifagirl :)) either through screen name or through blog content, the scenario is not far from the one I painted in your kitchen. There are real live people behind each screen name.
There is a some comparison, but the CR is so far removed from what you are describing! You can’t make eye contact with a person. You can’t smile at another person. You can’t see the other person. You have no idea what the other person looks like or even if the other person is really female or male. The CR is just words on a computer screen. There is no way to even get into contact with another person outside of the computer screen even if you wanted to. That is what the moderation is all about!
If you feel that there has been a breach of tznius here in the CR, then you should point it out to the moderators or the editor. Bring the specific instance and participators to their attention in an email.
For my own personal clarification, I will have to ask my Rav about this one.