If it is a yeshivishe crowd, do not go into the men – absolutely not – if you like, you can go to the women and ask to please pass on your feelings – if there is an attached doorpost, and you see the aveil is sitting by himself, you can stand at the door post and nod your head, and if he acknowledges you, you can say, Hamakom, and let him set the pace if he would feel right about you coming in while it is emptyish.
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