anon for this, Ask your local Orthodox Rabbi.
mariner, You have have drunk the liberal American kool-aid and don’t even realize it!
Let me repeat something another poster once posted on these boards:
“they are simply like stalks of wheat in the field of Golus, under the influence of whatever current goyish wind is blowing.
they are hardly to be blamed, they were never taught what Yiddishkeit means. They were born in an era of the greatest darkness in the history of the world, but think they walk in light.
they fulfill the Pasuk of “Hoster Hester”. not only is His face hidden, but they dont even know that it is hidden.
remember and use their posts
when Tisha B’Av comes, realize what we have lost, all the light, and try to weep.”