So, am I faulted after returning from a date for speaking to my father who is somewhat subjective when it comes to his little girl out of kibud av but making the decision with my rav who is looking at everything with daas torah and then calling the shadchan with a final answer (even if the phone rings fifty times while I am deciding with my father and my rav.) Torah is the reason I am doing this, therefore, kibud av followed by daat torah.
The rabanim know an aweful lot more then we give them credit for understanding. Those who think they are chachamim are tipshim and its converse holds true.
If we are using the torah to say 18 lachupah then every girl needs a rav also. God said all his commandments not the convenient ones. If you, as a father, have a daughter without a rav, then send her out to find one because this is every father’s responsibility.