My son’s friend got married in Chicago recently and provided him and 8 other bachurim with tickets to fly in to the wedding. My son said that was the best money that was spent at the wedding; to quote: “Ma, we didn’t stop dancing for a minute. They didn’t need fancy flowers or even food. We bachurim are the ones who made the wedding for the chassan.” So, when you look at it in this way, the car fare for bachurim to come to an out-of-town wedding should be included in the wedding expenses.
The previous posters hit the nail on the head, though inadvertantly, by asking “do you want to go to the wedding or not?” Of course they want to go, but each chasunah that yeshiva bachurim go to, and, B”H, there are many, takes a toll on them – money, time and lots of energy. (They look like they are having a great time dancing non-stop, and they are, but you gotta admit, it’s exhausting.) If they have to invest $100-200 each week to go to weddings, how many do you think the average bochur will attend.
And yes, it may be difficult to come up with the gas money on a bachur’s “wages” Don’t forget, they’re dating during this tekufah-i.e. renting cars, paying for drinks, and of course, paying hte dry cleaning bill so the suit they danced in at those weddings is presentable at the date.
So don’t come down so hard on these boys. They are learning hard and working hard at being mesameyach their married friends. give them a break, please.