Reply To: Rambam on Marriage

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Will Hill
Participant

6. Rambam (21:10): If a woman refuses to do any

obligatory Melachah, we force her, even with a

stick.

i. Rebuttal (Ra’avad): I never heard about hittng

women with sticks. Rather, he diminishes her

needs and food until she submits.

ii. Beis Yosef (EH 80 DH u’Mah she’Chosav Yir’eh):

The Tur says that the Rambam holds that

rebellion from Melachah is rebellion. He learns

from the fact that we force her with sticks. If

she could say ‘do not feed me, and I will not

work for you’, why would we force her? However,

why didn’t the Rambam say that we deduct from

her Kesuvah? I say that the Rambam does not

consider her a rebel. He said (12:4) that if

she says ‘do not feed me, and I will not work

for you’, we heed her. In Perek 21, he

discusses one who wants to be fed without

working. The Ran explains that since she did

not pardon food, he must still feed her,

therefore he can force her to work.

Alternatively, even when she says ‘do not feed

me, and I will not work for you’, this helps

only for spinning, but not for other Melachos.

iii. Rosh (5:31): Rav Huna says that refusing to

work is not rebellion. This is like he said

above, that a wife can tell her husband ‘do not

feed me, and I will not work for you.’ R. Yosi

b’Ribi Chanina says that it is rebellion. He

holds like Reish Lakish, who says that a man

can force his wife to work. If he can force

her, why is she considered a rebel? Since she

works only through coercion, she is a rebel.

(c) Poskim

1. Shulchan Aruch (EH 80:15): If a wife refuses to do a

mandatory Melachah, we force her.

i. Gra (25): We cannot say that we do not force at

all. We force a woman to nurse. Even if she

brings in 100 slaves, we force her (for

idleness ruins people).

2. Rema: He does not feed her until she does it. Beis

Din excommunicates her or sells her Kesuvah to hire

a slave. Some say that Beis Din forces her with

sticks.

i. Chelkas Mechokek (26): Beis Din does not

excommunicate her if he does not feed her, for

then she may say that she will not work for

him. Rather, they excommunicate her if he does

not want to withhold food, e.g. she is nursing

or for another reason.

See also:

CAN A WIFE EXEMPT HERSELF FROM HOUSEHOLD CHORES? (Kesuvos 63)