Charlie Brown, I don’t give that mayseh too much credence, either, but just repeating what I heard a long time ago.
As far as fleet of cars, as you can see, I have a large fan club (despite the fact that the kannaim want to throw me off YW). Just kidding.
JosephF, Believe it or not, life is full of compromises, and in fact nobody can possibly be midakdek on every nuance, which is why it is all a questions of priorities and emphasis. Let me give you an example. If you have children, and you will make them Bar-Mitzvahs, IY”H you will want to buy a pair of tefillin. But if you want to get absolutely the best around, you will find that it probably costs about 5,000 a pair (and may have to order 2 years in advance). So maybe you should spend it on the tefillin. But you may then find yourself short of money to pay his tuition. So if it is a choice of a $1500 pair, and sending him to yeshiva, or a $5000 pair and no yeshiva, you will probably go for the 1500 pair. However, you will be giving up some of the “nooks and crannies to a tee” of hilchos tefilin.
The gemara itself states that their are 3 aveiros that a person violates every day. However, if he did not interact with people at all, and stayed in a locked room, he could probably avoid the hirhurei aveirah and avak loshon hora. However, that would be at the expense of getting out to go to shul and to make a parnasah, etc., and to have a family.
Similarly, giving tzedakah is a huge mitzvah, but so is buying food for Shabbos. How do you do both if money is short, and you also have a tuition bill due, etc. What if there is an old lady who needs help, but you are on the way to tefilah btzibbur, you can only do one mitzvah now. Which do you do?.
So life is full of choices, and it is impossible to keep every mitzva fully. You may be living in a fantasy world, thinking it is possible, and probably some of the younger yeshiva bochurim who are the kannaim here (I believe) think the same thing, because they are still young and idealistic and inexperienced. But lmaysah, it is impossible.
Given these facts, one must make some choices. I personally have chosen ahavas yisroel of all types, loshon hora, and anivus to be my big 3. A big Rov once said that the biggest conflicts in life are between two good things. So if I get into a situation where another mitzva, as great as it might be, (say tochacha) might want me to hurt the feelings of another yid, I will pass, since it goes against my big 3. The only people I give tochacha to are my own kids, since they know I love them. A stranger on the street will likely think I have an ego problem and not listen, and be turned off.
I personally weigh the bein adam lchaveiro mitzvos more than the bein odom lamakom mitzvos, and feel that I have many many solid sources to do so, such as the gemara that says yimacheh Shmo al hamayim kdei laasos shalom bein ish l’ishto. Vahavta lreacha komocha say klal godol batorah. Mai dsanei oloch lchavreich lo saavid, zeh lol hatorah kula. Also look at last Rashi in Parshas Yisro which says that the kovod due to a human is greater than the kovod due to the Beis Hamikdash. I believe that the RBSH deeply wants us to honor our fellow man, and that it gives him great nachas ruach.
These are the choices I have made. You are entitled to make yours. But if you really believe that you will be able to do every mitzvah perfectly, I don’t think you are being honest. Choose wisely, and be consistent.
Let me conclude with a vort. Mi haish hachofetz chaim ohev yomim liros tov. Netzor leshoncha mera… What does it mean liros tov, to see good things? I think pshat is to see the good in others. If you want a long life to see all the gevaldige things that others do, then the way to see this good is to refrain from loshon hora. If you get into the habit of never even thinking bad about any yid, it is very easy never to say bad about any yid. And this will cause you to see the Tov in every yid, and you will be amazed at what they have accomplished.