gitty, I understand that some things happened in your life that gave you negative feelings towards yiddishkeit and made you want to leave. I also understand that you’ve come into contact with people who had frum shaitels and kitchens but treif hearts. And I do understand that you do feel happy in your new life and don’t feel that you are missing anything by leaving. I’m also really happy that your parents still show you that they love you and welcome you to visit, that shows that you couldn’t have picked better parents who I’m sure did their utmost to show you the beauty of yidishkeit.
However I truly hope that one day you will see for yourself the beauty of the Torah and the mitzvos and that you will meet up with truly frum people who are frum inside and out and treat you with respect. And I hope that thru them you will yourself come back and find an inner happiness in judaism that is even greater than the happiness and peace of mind that you have found in the secular world. That amazing connection to judaism exists and the type of people I described exist. I hope you come in contact with them soon.