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I wake up every morning at 6 in order to have time to do my hair. I have stick straight hair and like it curled and wavy, pinned back. Recently, at a salon the girl asked me if I would consider it. the price is fine, and it would certainly give me some more sleep time… I just need to hear first-hand from the females out there… Has anyone tried it? What would be the best way to go about it? Would it kill my hair? I hope not to be showing my hair to much longer, as I am in the parsha, so are there any short-term reasons for me not to perm?
Why do you wake up at six to ruin your straight hair????!!!!
Seriously, I don’t understand you. Straight hair is a gift from Hashem. Why would you ruin it?!
Yup. Sorry, my reaction was a bit extreme.
My friend got her hair permanently straightened a few years ago, they said she hadta get it redone every few months, but she only did it like every year. However, with curling you would prob havta get it done more often…..but it’s a great idea; I would love to do it! You should go for it!
Short term reasons not to perm:
Perming hair, explained very simply, is a way of breaking the di-sulphide bonds in the hair and then recreating new ones in a way that keeps the hair in a new position, ie. in the shape of curls. The results may be what you wish for: permanently curly hair, however this does not mean that you hair will be perfect. The redox chemicals used on the hair during the process often weaken the hair, and other side effects may even include loss of hair.
It is understandable that you may want to change something about your appearance, but there is more than one way to look “nice”, and sometimes showing respect to yourself and appreciating the way that you are could effectively boost your self esteem and make you feel better about the way you look. Who am I to judge, but I have the notion that -especially if you are looking for a husband- you may find that many people, including men, will respect you and give you the attention that you want if you respect yourself and do not feel that you have to bend (or curl?) to social norms in order to feel valid.
Perhaps try to appreciate yourself for what you have and what you are good at. Improving externalities isn’t always bad, but there are other things out there too.
Bracha and Hatzlacha!
I really hate it when someone who asks a practical question gets a lecture (or two), but no practical advice.
Cozimjewish gave practical advice, I think…
in high school my straight-ish hair became too curly to wear straight and too straight to wear curly. It always looked like I hadn’t brushed it. I used to perm it curly so it would be consistent and look more “mentschlich” (?). I have to tell you that it only came out the way I wanted it too 1 out of 3 times. Eventually I stopped because it was too annoying to live with that. It gave me split ends but they grew out so who cares. My daughter had stunning curls that started looking more half and half as well so she irons it. I think that has damaged her hair way more than the perms damaged mine.
I hate to say it tho, but I do agree that it is more important to be happy with ourselves as we are. I do believe that we think what we don’t have is somehow better than what we have.
Go for it (JF is absolutely right – the girl asked for advice, not a mussar schmooze). Perms are great for people who have less than easy to style hair, but do you want a “body wave” to make your hair more easily able to take and retain a waved shape, or do you want a “frizzy perm” of very curly hair? I personally would go for the body wave. It is more versatile.
Shteig,
Am I understanding you?
You’re suggesting that if I’m a woman (check) and I respect myself and appreciate the way I am (check, check), then I should throw away my cosmetics, my hair care products, my heels, & etc, and stop keeping track of how many portions of brownies and ice cream I’ve consumed? And now many people, including men, will respect me?
Does that include my husband?
Just wondering…
I permed my son’s peyos. The result, a great curl.
Bad part, baiscally a perm is the stylist puts rollers in ur hair and then chemicals above it. The hair just above the roller (cuz she cant get the roller onto the scalp) gets frizzy and not part of the perm.
Also I found it oxidized my sons hair a little.
One more point, right after the perm, like for the first two weeks, the curls were boing boing until the perm settled a bit.
“It’s always the girls with straight who curl and the girls with curly who straighten, It’s the way of life.”
My mother o”h had naturally curly hair and never straightened it.
It wasnt meant to be specific. Hundreds or thousand of girls leave their hair the way it is
Well, I thought that advice was at least a little practical, considering the minor chemistry lesson about perming and its possible adverse effects.
Yup, just work on the pnimius- that’s all that counts.
Ha, nah, not really. But don’t rain in on my mussar shmooze parade, I was having fun. Really.
But tachlis I still think that its worth working on self appreciation as well as anything else you may choose to work on.
Don’t drink the redox chemicals, in any case. But than again, that’s just friendly advice.
#Question
“Every girl has a right and a mitzvah to look pretty”
Which mitzvah would that be?
Every girl has a right and a mitzvah to look pretty, and if this is my way, so be it.
Right? Mitzvah? Can you explain either of those?
No, it’s because when people see scars they think battle scars. Girls shouldn’t fight in wars.
Oh curls are NO fun…
Well they are if you spend 1/2 an hour every morning mousing them so you don’t look like the Lion King.
Seriously, when I wake up, you CAN mistake my hair for a mane, it really gets that frizzy.
I never knew it was even possible.
There is SO much you can do with straight hair!!!!!!!!
bRAIDS, FRENCH, FISHTAIL, REGULAR…
Buns, messy, cute, fun, regular,
ponytails, inward pony tail, clips, half pony’s, half braids, braids woven trough out hair, or as bangs, or a braid headband.
OR cut your hair short and wear it as a bob (A girl in my class came to school today with like 2 meters of her hair missing…)
Curly hair: Mouse, cream, more mouse, maybe a pony, or half pony with a clip….
Did you try wearing your hair with a cute funky headband and a messy side bun???
That looks good on like everyone….
You need to figure out how to deal with your hair, what’s good, what products, ways to wear it…
Pity you can’t just send me a picture…
Look your hair can’t be that bad,
Cuz mine is the absolute worst!!!
RebYidd– and that could be ????? ???. And everyone knows that girls should be .???? ?????– ??? ??.
Look your hair can’t be that bad,
Cuz mine is the absolute worst!!!
Oh so there’s a competition now… Well, I would win hands down, without a question. Shopping – ever tried thinnings? It will probably tame it down a lot because there would be a lot less hair contributing to the look, though if you love your “mane” like I love mine than you probably would find it a bit traumatic.
Why would anyone not want to look like the Lion king?
Rebyidd you are really funny! 😀 😀
RebYidd23 – You should respond, with a deafening growl, “IS THAT A CHALLENGE?!” And wait for someone to say, “Oh, no, RebYidd23, I wouldn’t DREAM of challenging you!” 😛
Too late. <growl too deafening to post>
I only have to curl on the sides if my head otherwise I’m good
When I was a young man, about 30 years ago I had an afro. It lasted for months. Now I am a grandfather and the kids got frum
To Hashtagposter –
Could you please give a source of your statement that there is a cifference between a boy and a girl having a cut on the face stitched on Shabbos. Thank you.
#If you don’t know, it’s not because you’re a girl. It’s because you didn’t learn the source.
I never got a perm for the above mentioned reasons (peiyes)
I don’t know a source min HaTorah for this, but my teacher says its to prevent out husbands from “eyeing other women.”
streekgeek: Thinning is not always good. My sister had her hair thinned and it was as poofy as ever and very itchy as it grew back in. She regretted it for a long time. (My mother’s sheitelmacher described her hair as the second worst she’d ever seen. Beautiful, I mean, but very hard to deal with. She now gets keratin- not enough to keep it always straight but enough to keep it manageable.)
Did anyone ever try the Curly Girl method? My friend swears by it, but I’ve always been a bit too chicken to try it.
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