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Should a person strive to be rather in the box, or out of the box? (I know everyone has their own understanding of what ‘in the box’ means. I’m leaving that open to each individual’s interpretation.)
I, for one, cannot stand boxes of any sort. (except Breadberry’s or Pomegranate’s or Evergreen’s or Chanuka gifts or…Those I like when there’s good stuff inside.) But maybe the desire to break free of any is in itself a box? Whaddya think…?
well if its a good box(like talmedei chachamim) i would say yes
if its a bad box (like new yorkers are snobby) i would say no
Strive to be “in the box,” but always consider keeping the mind open to that which is “out of the box.” Not everything in life goes according to the neat little preconceptions that we have in our minds. It is good to be mainstream, but sometimes we have to take a detour, and we need the flexibility to deal with it.
Put a small box into the bigger one and come out of that one.
An original is more valuable than a copy.
It’s good to be mainstream cuz generally, when a lot of people do something a certain way, there is a valid reason for it.
There’s plenty of room to be original before leaving a society, which in turn puts you in the box of like minded individuals. I know plenty of people who in their quest to find originality are exactly like the rest of them.
I am not made out of my hat. My clothing (for the first couple of months) look like those of my friends, but I don’t think people confuse me for someone else.
You can be original but if your goal is simply originality that is hardly original.
But many things are personal. They may have valid reasons, but those reasons may not apply to everyone.
It’s good to be mainstream cuz generally, when a lot of people do something a certain way, there is a valid reason for it.
generally yes.
many times people use “out of the box” as a cover for a feeling of one or more of the following: non acceptance, rebellion, low self esteem and overcompensate, haughtiness/ holier than thou etc.
Haleivi- i think i mostly agree with you except, “You can be original but if your goal is simply originality that is hardly original.”
Sometimes a persons originality is stifled by a strong feeling to follow along with everyone else. In such a case he has to actively be original to balance hisself out.
Evatchbechinor,
Notice that I wrote “generally.”
In some cases, it is indeed the kind of thing where everyone is playing a game of follow the leader. But the majority of times, society has some logic to the way they do things. To say otherwise is just stupid.
Evtach, it’s good to be mainstream, because we have to live within the bounds of society. But please note, I ALSO said, that we have to be flexible, and sometimes that means accepting out of the box thinking, as well. But if we didn’t GENERALLY follow mainstream rules of order, everything would be chaotic.
Sometimes we also have to accept that not everyone is able to conform ALL the time. But there has to be SOME conformity at least some of the time. We cannot live in a balagan.
Should a person strive to be rather in the box, or out of the box?
Neither. The focus should be on what is necessary, while ensuring that you remain, to a certain extent, “in the box,” because 1) “L’olam y’hei dato shel adam me’urav im habrios” / “Al tifrosh min hatzibbur,” 2) of practical reasons – you don’t want to be
rejected by your society. But so long as you can get away with something, it’s okay (assuming it’s not something you shouldn’t be trying to get away with).
I, for one, cannot stand boxes of any sort. […] But maybe the desire to break free of any is in itself a box?
If you’re influenced by (read as: consume) non-Jewish media,
that may well be. They’re apparently trying to turn out an entire nation of identical anti-authoritarian individualists.
Anyway, if you’re bored, leave the CR alone and go watch Maru the cat, or some unboxing videos. Maybe you’ll learn to like boxes! But not as much as Maru 🙂
Depends on whose box it is. Too many teens go off the derech because the box of acceptability expected of them has gotten so small that many just don’t fit.
Now, if the “box” is Torah and sensible yiddishkeit, then I’m all for it.
As usual, such an inspecific question cannot warrant a good answer. You have to explain what sort of box we are talking about here.
Everybody should feel comfortable being who they are. You should not try to be somebody you are not. (Oscar Wilde once said “Be yourself, everybody else is taken”) However, you have to define who you are, and that is where your question begins.
(In other words, you shouldn’t be doing things because others do, and you don’t have the strength of character to stop, you should be doing them because you want to or feel you have to).
What you want to do in regards to in/out the box is obviously dependant on every case on its own merits.
And being out-the-box purely for the reason of not-being-in-the-box – that is ???? ?? ??????, and the rebellious streak that is wron. Being out-the-box because you are isn’t as terrible. (Although “who-you-are” might dictate that you want to be in-the-box, but like I said, we need specific scenarios for that)
Most people are in the box. If someone is striving to be out of the box, then they are not really out of the box. I dont think it’s a matter of choice. Out of the boxes should not be harshed by in the boxes, though. Let them be, learn from them, enrich your life by knowing them!
Many people have no choice and have to stay “in the box” to be part of the society they live in or schools they go to etc. There are many senseless unspoken rules that you have to abide by in certain areas that have nothing with halacha. And don’t say so hon live somewhere else cause its not so easy once you’re rooted somewhere.
eftachbchinor:
“Randomex, I just re-read this. I like your answer. Sorry took so long to respond ;).”
Thanks! Sorry about that last paragraph – I hadn’t yet gotten an
explanation of why you kept posting philosophical questions, and
given recent activities, you might have noticed that a rambling style of speech is typical of trolls. 🙂
Did you see Maru, though? He’s so cute!
P.S. This is the thread where I accidentally discovered
stackable quoting because I forgot the “/” in the closer.
I love being able to clearly quote conversations –
thanks for your role in the discovery.
Ultimately, let’s not worry so much about what the other guy is.
Depends if you are engaged yet.
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