Home › Forums › Decaffeinated Coffee › So it's rosh hashanah and the people sitting near you are chatting
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September 14, 2012 5:33 pm at 5:33 pm #604902repharimMember
You ask them to stop and they continue to talk during davening, probably even giving you a look like who the heck are you to tell me what to do.(Imagine a 30yr old telling a 50yr old to shutup!)
The shul is packed, you can’t move anywhere else, question is, what do you do now?
September 16, 2012 2:53 am at 2:53 am #897097golferParticipantThere is nothing you can do in such a situation that won’t create some kind of problem, including doing nothing. It may be a little late for this year but I strongly suggest, even if it entails a certain amount of inconvenience to you or your family, find yourself a different place to daven. There are definitely places where you will not have this problem. I won’t start listing ideas, because that doesn’t seem like a good idea either.
September 16, 2012 3:42 am at 3:42 am #897098popa_bar_abbaParticipantStone them with your esrogim.
September 16, 2012 3:42 am at 3:42 am #897099popa_bar_abbaParticipantBlast a shofar in their ear!
September 16, 2012 3:43 am at 3:43 am #897100popa_bar_abbaParticipantWait until they start shmone esrei, then stand right near them in their personal space and start shmone esrei also.
September 16, 2012 3:51 am at 3:51 am #897101WIYMemberI really hope that this wont happen. We need Rosh Hashannah like never before how can people have the nerve to talk by Davening ON ROSH HASHANAH?!
September 16, 2012 3:56 am at 3:56 am #897102zalmanParticipantask the Rav to talk to them
September 16, 2012 4:06 am at 4:06 am #897103MiddlePathParticipantIt may help to look at it this way: G-d knows how special and meaningful your prayers are, so He is sending something that may cause you to falter and lose concentration, thereby giving you an opportunity to elevate your prayers even more if you can overcome that inconvenience. G-d sends tests to those He loves.
September 16, 2012 4:16 am at 4:16 am #897104DovidMMemberAt my shul, there is always the ability for me to move as not every seat is taken. That being said, I would probably consider the following:
1) There probably have been times when I disturbed others in the same way, and I was oblivious to the effect I was having on others. I regret any and all times that I have done so.
2) The people may be “once a year” visitors to the shul. If they are shushed by a regular, they will form an opinion of the relative friendliness of the shul, and this will provide them with a reason not to come on a regular Shabbos.
3) I might not recognize the person but he could be a generous contributor to the shul, and helps to keep the lights on.
4) Will my shushing be heard by more people than their talking? Really, this is an issue, since to get their attention, you have to be louder than they are.
While the Gabbai can’t be everywhere, I have seen people going to the Gabbai when a group wouldn’t knock it off.
September 16, 2012 4:25 am at 4:25 am #897105WIYMemberrepharim
Try pleading with them in a very sincere way. Say please it is Rosh Hashanah Im just trying to have Kavana so I can have a good year so my family will be healthy and have parnassah so we can serve Hashem. It is very disturbing when people talk by Davening. Please try not to talk.
September 16, 2012 4:30 am at 4:30 am #897106☕ DaasYochid ☕ParticipantDaven really loud.
September 16, 2012 5:22 am at 5:22 am #897107popa_bar_abbaParticipantIt depends. Are the the baal korei?
(Hey wolf!)
September 16, 2012 7:50 am at 7:50 am #897108YW Moderator-42ModeratorI will be talking during laining this year, hopefully loud enough for all to hear.
September 16, 2012 2:09 pm at 2:09 pm #897109Sam2ParticipantIgnore them. There’s nothing else you can do.
September 19, 2012 2:27 pm at 2:27 pm #897110miritchkaMemberIts really sad that this has become something so commonly found in many shuls. But what hurt me more, was when i told my child to make sure to keep quiet, and she turns to me after davening and said “but in this shul they let you talk!” It was hard for me to explain that it isnt ok. B”h it is not our regular shul and i dont plan on going back there again.
As the famous line goes:
If you come to shul to talk, where do you go to daven?!
September 19, 2012 7:52 pm at 7:52 pm #897111popa_bar_abbaParticipantOK, so the guy in front of me had really big ears. I mean, like huge. And I was so amazed by them, and wondering if they were always that big, or if they got bigger as he got older.
So I wanted to show my brother. But it was during chazaras hashatz mussaf so I couldn’t talk. And I didn’t want to point. So I first tried to motion with my eyes, but he didn’t catch. So then I found the word “ear” in my machzor, and pointed to it. And then pointed to the word “gedolah”. So then he saw and we giggled quietly to ourselves.
But then, I realized I should have showed him from sefer yonah. So I looked in my seatpocket, and found a chumash, and it had maftir yona. So I showed him ???? ??????. And then we giggled again, and I walked out so I wouldn’t laugh.
September 19, 2012 8:31 pm at 8:31 pm #897112WhiteberryMemberHey, at least they won’t be texting. Try to find SOME zchus for each jew, as you would want them to do for you.
September 20, 2012 3:03 am at 3:03 am #897113WIYMemberpopa_bar_abba
Almost sounds like me and my brothers at times lol.
September 20, 2012 8:08 pm at 8:08 pm #897114oomisParticipantNot as bad as me getting both the hiccups AND a case of the giggles during the silent Amidah on Yom Kippur, when I was around 11 years old.
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