Home › Forums › Tefilla / Davening › I am desperate to enjoy davening,
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July 5, 2012 8:05 am at 8:05 am #603999yid_pashutMember
I am desperate to enjoy davening,
Please give me tips
July 5, 2012 5:21 pm at 5:21 pm #1022870ZeesKiteParticipantHa! We all are.
Try understanding basic meaning.
Try envisioning yourself a darling doting before your ever-merciful father.
July 5, 2012 5:43 pm at 5:43 pm #1022871RedNails19ParticipantBefore anything , as much i feel davening is crutial and beatiful; start with the small things
begin your day with modeh ani
make small changes in your life
get inspired
buy a book
visit someone who will touch you- an old friend, grandparent, s/o sick or elderly
do chessed
open you life to the possibilities
and most IMPORTANTLY -be GRATEFUL…when you take evn just a few SECONDS to verbally thank Hashem for the good things he gives you, it will change the way you feel and live- and daven!
Good Luck!!
July 5, 2012 6:24 pm at 6:24 pm #1022872M.O. ChossidMemberTry to forget about all your troubles for one moment.
Take a step at a time. Try to concentrate in answering AMENS with more Kavanah, for instance. Then go from there.
July 5, 2012 6:33 pm at 6:33 pm #1022873147ParticipantArriving on time {for Schacharis being defined as 5 minutes early, so that you are already clad with Tallis & Tefillin for commencement of services} shall surely enhance the Davening experience.
July 5, 2012 6:37 pm at 6:37 pm #1022874JustHavingFunParticipantI found the book “My Father, My King” by Rabbi Zelig Pliskin to be a valuable tool in personalizing my relationship with HKB”H. Also the “Praying with Fire” series is designed to assist us to get into our davening and add spark to it. Good luck… and I’d like to read about any successful experiences you have.
July 5, 2012 6:38 pm at 6:38 pm #1022875yytzParticipantA few ideas:
1) Do you get enough sleep? If you never get enough sleep, it may be hard to be in a good mood while davening shacharis.
2) Do you drink coffee or tea before davening? If not, consider it, because a little caffeine can put you in a good mood.
3) If I recall correctly, Rambam says we should sit and meditate an hour before and after davening! If that’s what we’re really supposed to do, then surely we can manage to spend one or two minutes meditating before davening. Close your ideas, clear your mind and try to concentrate on love and yearning for Hashem. (“To you, Lord, I lift my soul” — Tehillim 25.) Learn more about meditation from kosher sources such as R’ Aryeh Kaplan or R’ Dovber Pinson. Meditation can be extremely enjoyable, so making your davening like a meditation should help.
4) Spend a minute or two, or even just a few seconds, of personal prayer in your own words before davening, or in the middle of davening, between sections. Ask Hashem to open your heart and allow yourself to pray with true kavanah and devotion. If you don’t have time during davening, pray at some other time during the day for a few minutes, asking Hashem to let you serve him with joy. Check out the Chofetz Chaim’s quote on hisbodedus (search using the term hitbodedut on google to find it easily online), or the sections on tefilah and hisbodedus in Likutei Eitzot.
5) Do you daven with a fast minyan? Maybe you could find a slower one?
6) Start on the section of davening you identify with the most, and try to do that with as much feeling and kavanah as you can. Then expand that slowly to other parts of the service.
7) Spend a few minutes before davening thanking Hashem for all the good things you have and that have happened to you (and even for the seemingly bad). There’s tons of empirical evidence from psychological studies that gratitude makes you feel happy!
July 5, 2012 6:45 pm at 6:45 pm #1022876jewish sourceParticipantDaven loud Scream if they let you don’t be embarrassed
Hachana to davening will give you chiyus
Gemara beiyun break your head on line after line on a Rashi NO ARTSCROL boduk imnuse you will have gevadige davening
July 5, 2012 6:52 pm at 6:52 pm #1022877Shopping613 ðŸŒParticipantThat’s sort of hard when e/o around you is talking…..
July 5, 2012 7:09 pm at 7:09 pm #1022878YusselParticipantTefillah is called AVODAH SheBalev. It’s meant as SERVICE of Hashem, not an interesting and enjoyable acitivity. Try adopting a position of humility and SERVICE to HaShem.
July 5, 2012 7:37 pm at 7:37 pm #1022879gavra_at_workParticipantWhenever something good happens that day, thank Hashem on the spot. Then, when you daven, remind yourself of all that Hashem did for you, and you will feel the need to thank Him.
Good luck.
July 5, 2012 8:18 pm at 8:18 pm #1022880The little I knowParticipantHere are several ideas that are worth trying.
1. Let every tefillo include a silent, personal request from HKB”H. It can be in English, or whatever language you feel useful in expressing your desire. It can be a small thing (G-d, help me pass my history test today), or bigger issues such as success in parnosoh, shidduchim for your children, etc.
2. There are many seforim and books that provide much more information about our tefillos beyond the translation. What is the origin of a particular tefillo, when did it become part of the accepted nusach, what are the differences in nusach and what do they mean, what kavanos are appropriate for which parts of tefillo, etc?
3. Approach tefillo as an emotional experience that should leave behind a residual change. The Baal Shem Tov is quoted as stating, “If you are after davening the same as you were before davening, why did you bother?”
4. Take note of others davening. While there are some who appear to address davening as a chore, there are always those who are sincere. Perhaps there are mispallelim who are putting on a show, and are totally enveloped in their own egos. But the sincere people who are focused on relishing the opportunity to stand in the presence of the Shechina – take note of them. Don’t mimic them. Just join in the process.
5. Recall that each of us is a child of Hashem, and that he is only asking for a few precious minutes to speak to him every day. We take the three steps to approach our Father who wants to shower us with the shefa that is best for us. All He wants is for us to ask Him.
These are some ideas that may resonate. Try them out. See what works.
July 5, 2012 9:22 pm at 9:22 pm #1022881ItcheSrulikMemberIt’s hard to give advice without knowing what you’re doing already and exactly what you find uninteresting or difficult about tefillah, but here are some general things.
1- Talk to God throughout the day. For example, when something goes well, thank Hashem then and there. When something goes wrong ask the ribbono shel olam for help.
2- Look forward to davening. For example, when something comes up that you’re worried about, remind yourself to daven for it “ok, I have to ask for hatzlacha with x at mincha”
3- Know what you’re saying, especially the long parts that people read to themselves. Rav Soloveichik used to describe different parts of tefilla as music with the different aspects of a Jew’s relationship with God as harmonies. Rav Yaakov Kaminecki used to say that pesukei d’zimra was all the mussar seder he needed for the day. Those last two thoughts in particular should help.
July 5, 2012 9:33 pm at 9:33 pm #1022882popa_bar_abbaParticipantDon’t beat yourself up too much over it. Most people don’t have very much kavanna.
You will daven better by generally improving your relationship with Hashem. That is a slow process which is the work of a lifetime. (And then just when you’re getting someplace-iyou die! How dumb is that?)
Unless the problem is psychological. Then you should see a therapist.
July 5, 2012 10:46 pm at 10:46 pm #1022883ItcheSrulikMemberPBA: I get “don’t beat yourself up over it” and I meant to put that in but what does it matter if other people have kavanna or not? Besides, Kavanna and dveikus are not exactly the same thing.
July 5, 2012 10:58 pm at 10:58 pm #1022884pcozMemberes duchtsach mir az es dahrf sein psychological, wie noch kenn mihr stehen fahr Eybishten ohn tzitteren und moyrah? Ober der shaalah dahrf sein, wehr get sein der psycholog?
July 5, 2012 11:17 pm at 11:17 pm #1022885popa_bar_abbaParticipantItche: By that I meant for him to justify why he shouldn’t beat himself up, because it is normal.
July 5, 2012 11:52 pm at 11:52 pm #1022886ItcheSrulikMemberpcoz: Ihre Judische Schriebung is stark beeinflusst von heutig hochdeutsch.
(Vi zogt men orthography af goyish?)
July 6, 2012 12:39 am at 12:39 am #1022887pcozMemberShaigetz – Um ehrlich zu sein denke ich Hochdeutsch ging vor einiger Zeit
July 6, 2012 2:26 am at 2:26 am #1022888yytzParticipantHave you tried learning the Bilvavi Mishkan Evneh seforim? You can read them for free online in English. Some people are really getting into them, from all streams of Yiddishkeit. Even if much of it is not directly about davening, it could be helpful for it.
July 6, 2012 1:36 pm at 1:36 pm #1022889BTGuyParticipantI find that in a slower minyan, I enjoy davening more. I take a deep breath and focus on the words I am about to daven, and try to understand and articulate each word with clarity and meaning.
A slower minyan helps me increase my concentration and benefit by being around talmidim who daven even slower and with tremendous kavana.
The more you get inside the prayers, to me, the more enjoyment, and fulfillment there is.
I put concerted effort into “getting into it”. And even if I try to think of excuses to go to a later minyan as I am going to a shul, a few minute of concerted effort leads into a very fulfilling davening, BH.
Also, reading Pathway to Prayer has been a big influence on my approach, in addition to, lahavdil, rock n roll. lol. I say to myself if I could be passionate about music and lyrics and concerts when I was younger, really getting into the instrumentation and lyrics of select groups, how much more so should I put that kind of focus into, davening to our Creator. I hate to say it, but thinking about that helps me daven deeper.
July 6, 2012 8:13 pm at 8:13 pm #1022890ItcheSrulikMemberJuly 8, 2012 8:34 am at 8:34 am #1022891sm29ParticipantSomething you can try is thinking of the blessings that you have in your life and feeling grateful.
If you don’t understand the words in the siddur, study beforehand the translation so you know what you are saying and it’s more meaningful.
Imagine yourself in a spiritual realm connecting to Hashem
And pray to Him to help you enjoy
July 8, 2012 5:25 pm at 5:25 pm #1022892WIYMemberIn my experience the following things work:
1. Daven in a shul where they are machshiv davening and the oylum is into davening and davening with feeling (more common in a chassidish shul, or a yeshiva minyan)
2. Try to sit next to people who dont talk by davening and are into the davening. If you sit next to “good daveners” it will rub off on you. Additionally, talkers will distract you.
3. Try as much as possible not to look out of the siddur. You really start to connect to Hashem when its just you, your siddur and Hashem. I learned this from Rav Shlomo Brevda.
4. This should be before 1 but its obvious, you must know what the davening means not just the translation but also some perush into teh ideas and concepts. I daven from the Artscroll interlinear siddur and I find that when I dont have it my davening just isnt the same.
August 1, 2012 11:51 pm at 11:51 pm #1022893torahblazerMemberthe way to like and enjoy davening is to say the words 100 percent correctly by putting the accent on the correct syllable and saying shva nachs and shva nahs correctly and pronouncing H-ashems name correctly. all of this is not to difficult to learn , it just takes a little time and everyday practice and finding someone to teach it to you if you don’t have any sources of your own
August 3, 2012 12:39 am at 12:39 am #1022894pcozMembersometimes the way to enjoy davening is to do the opposite – which is just to think of nothing and let the words say themselves
August 3, 2012 4:21 am at 4:21 am #1022895CuriosityParticipantI strongly disagree with “pcoz”. That sounds like lip service to me.
First of all, you must understand what you are saying.
As far as enjoyment. I usually only enjoy davening when I get there 10-15 minutes early and say korbanos, ketoret, or other pre-davening things to get my mind in the right place. Also, it makes me feel like davening is not so much of a burden when I do this. Ironic, but it works. Also, being the first person there is a special feeling.
August 3, 2012 3:58 pm at 3:58 pm #1022896WIYMemberHonestly there are many great ideas on this thread but if a person doesnt know what every word means its not possible to enjoy Davening. I dont know why this is advice that must be given it should be common sense but it seems that when it comes to these things common sense goes out the window. Some people foolishly expect that spiritual attainments should be easy. Just like you have to work extremely hard to earn a million dollars, to excel spiritually also takes a lot of effort. Davening is not automatic, it requires feeling and heart and to access the heart it requires thought and contemplation. You have to be fully mentally absorbed in it.
August 15, 2012 5:20 pm at 5:20 pm #1022897sm29ParticipantHow is it coming along? Sometimes things take time, but every effort counts.
August 15, 2012 10:43 pm at 10:43 pm #1022898cholent guyParticipantIt would take much too long for everyone to post everything. Read praying with fire and other books from a library and a seforim store
July 6, 2014 7:12 am at 7:12 am #1022899Shopping613 ðŸŒParticipantAny new tips by newbies?
Found this threads in my favorites, and I thought we should bring it back up for some newer members who haven’t seen it, such a helpful thread.
Enjoy!
July 7, 2014 4:16 pm at 4:16 pm #1022900popa_bar_abbaParticipantTry having a kiddush club. Definitely makes it more enjoyable.
July 9, 2014 4:38 pm at 4:38 pm #1022902squeakParticipantAgreed. A kiddush club is the only valid reason to daven with a minyiiiiin (did I spell that properly?l
July 10, 2014 1:57 pm at 1:57 pm #1022903EY YidMemberRead In Forest and Fields by Rav Shalom Arush. It will change your davening.
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