I don’t dip my fingers & then put them into my pockets etc., because after I did do so once or twice, my pockets & fingers became so sticky thereafter, that I discontinued this practice.
Getting back to the original questions, how many times do you dip your fingers and where do you apply your wet fingers to (which pockets, ears, eyebrows.)
The Rema writes in Siman 296 “one spills from the cup after Havdalah and puts out the fire and washes his eyes in it due to love of the mitzvah. So in answer to your question, i touch the wine and then my eyes (like i would do in the morning with water). So which “prominent Rav” argues on the Rema? Maybe he meant like the Mishna Berurah writes to only overflow the cup a little bit because of the loss of the juice, i.e. more than a little bit would be baal tashchis.