Home › Forums › Shidduchim › Too Girly
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August 30, 2011 7:35 pm at 7:35 pm #599013s2021Member
A friend of mine got dumped after date 1 cuz dude said shes “Too Girly.” What duz that mean?? Thoughts??
August 30, 2011 7:48 pm at 7:48 pm #838951babygooseParticipantthis can mean many things and can be defined differently by many. now, i happen to be a female that’s very tomboyish.
being girly as i understand it to be:
cries for every little thing, very emotional, very moody, gets crazy over certain things, very “pitchetchy” as they would say… and if i may say, i see why the guys hate it…
August 30, 2011 7:58 pm at 7:58 pm #838952shlishiMember“girly” sounds to be the antonym of “tomboy”.
August 30, 2011 8:00 pm at 8:00 pm #838953be goodParticipantThis is the perfect reason for this thread: http://www.theyeshivaworld.com/coffeeroom/topic/reason-for-saying-no
How do I cross-link them?
August 30, 2011 8:05 pm at 8:05 pm #838954bein_hasdorimParticipantis she under 22? I would say either she came across as immature,
or just too girly. A guy understands that girls are extremely different than guys. However when they come across too intensely
with their girlishness, this could even be in conversation,
talking about real girly things with the guy, he may feel to alienated and uncomfortable by her, and her choice of conversation.
There is no one way to describe it but i’ll try.
Perhaps she says “like” like every third word, engrossed in a conversation about how her friend likes purple flowers and like she likes pink flowers, and like when her friend like went to the store to buy her that top and they were like out of the pink flowers omg! She like should’ve know to get her the fuchsia flowered one instead of the purple Right? I mean like omg, you like totally understand where i’m coming from right.
This is just a rough example, I think you can imagine how a guy
would feel having to listen to this type of jabber (Please look up the word) for two hours.
August 30, 2011 8:12 pm at 8:12 pm #838955oomisParticipantAll the responses makes sense to me. Immature might be the best description.
August 30, 2011 8:35 pm at 8:35 pm #838956aries2756ParticipantAll these may be things to think about and work on if they are true, on the other hand HE might need a dating coach to explain that girls are “girly” and boys should be “manly”. A boy cannot expect a girl to act like his chavrusah and should understand that girls will behave differently than their friends do.
So you might have to review the date and see if there were things you did or if there is something about you naturally that would give off a particular “girly” or immature vibe. If it is true then you can thank him for being honest so you can work on the areas that need improvement in order to help you for future shidduchim. If he is off the mark, then just chalk it up to a mismatch and move on. Don’t let it get to you.
August 30, 2011 8:40 pm at 8:40 pm #838957bein_hasdorimParticipantaries2756; the op is clearly states “A friend of mine”.
So It is absolutely totally not her.
August 30, 2011 8:52 pm at 8:52 pm #838958s2021Memberbein- lol. N I actually dont hafta look it up.
aries- It was a friend, not me. One vibe I almost never give off (in person anyway, dunno bout coffeeroom) is immature. N yeah.. Like- duz this guy not know what girls r like?? I never heard of that one yet..
August 30, 2011 9:00 pm at 9:00 pm #838959bein_hasdorimParticipants2021; To be honest, some guys like a girly girl, and find it cute.
I have a friend (not me) who keeps complaining that many girls that are Redt to him are sad and boring.
August 30, 2011 9:03 pm at 9:03 pm #838960HaLeiViParticipantHaLeVia says, too girly might mean that she actually got insulted when he casually made a rude or nasty comment.
August 30, 2011 9:10 pm at 9:10 pm #838961aries2756ParticipantBH, my apologies to the OP, please replace any inference to the OP in my post with “your friend”.
August 30, 2011 9:18 pm at 9:18 pm #838962popa_bar_abbaParticipantIt means fat.
(cshapiro, this is your cue to yell at me.)
August 30, 2011 9:28 pm at 9:28 pm #838963bptParticipantFor a boy to say a girl is “too girly” is a 5-alarm code red in my book. What does he want… someone who is more masculine?
She was lucky to get out while she could.
August 30, 2011 10:12 pm at 10:12 pm #838964stuck in brooklynMemberS2021, your sentence structure and grammar leads me to believe that the individual in question, is in fact yourself.
August 30, 2011 10:25 pm at 10:25 pm #838965bein_hasdorimParticipantsib; Here again we go with the grammer.
Are you by any chance substituting for haifagirl?
(How’d you like my spelling and structure?)
August 30, 2011 11:34 pm at 11:34 pm #838966cshapiroMemberwas she wearing all pink?
August 31, 2011 1:57 am at 1:57 am #838967HaLeiViParticipantMr. Stuck, anyone around here long enough knows that that is not the case.
August 31, 2011 2:24 am at 2:24 am #838968collegegradMemberthere should be some kind of coffee room shadchan here. would be hysterical to go out with another person who spends waaay to much time on here.
August 31, 2011 2:29 pm at 2:29 pm #838969yungerman1ParticipantPBA- It does not at all mean that.
bpt- Read bein_hasdorim’s explanation – which had me LOL!
Talking loud, very animated, constant use of words like “like” and OMG, and over exaggerating everything are some of the signs. When you see one you will know it… and probably start laughing!
August 31, 2011 3:15 pm at 3:15 pm #838970mustangriderMemberBein – ur fist post had me rolling! Thanx!!!
September 6, 2011 12:16 am at 12:16 am #838971bein_hasdorimParticipantas always, your very welcome mustang!
December 27, 2011 7:32 am at 7:32 am #838972bochur540Participanttalks with a girl accent
offended easily
very emotional/moody
neat freak
December 27, 2011 1:53 pm at 1:53 pm #838973rainbow spyMemberBochur540, are you forreal?? I’d say the first 3 things you said are true, but the last one only goes with personality..there are guys that are neat freaks too, it’s not only a girls thing.
Do you mean girly accent as in not in a women tone of voice?
December 27, 2011 2:59 pm at 2:59 pm #838974JotharMemberDoesn’t like smoking.
December 27, 2011 3:46 pm at 3:46 pm #838975yentingyentaParticipantjothar, its girly to dislike smoking?
December 27, 2011 3:50 pm at 3:50 pm #838976ZeesKiteParticipantToo girly means he wanted only one girl, he got more.
December 27, 2011 4:56 pm at 4:56 pm #838977JotharMemberShe either disliked smoking or disliked B.O., and the guy was offended.
Or she didn’t have a mustache.
December 27, 2011 5:50 pm at 5:50 pm #838978yungerman1Participantbochur540- On a first date its not that easy to know if she is offended easily and very emotional/moody unless she mentioned more than once instance of of both….or she blabbed on and on and on and on and on and on…..
December 27, 2011 6:30 pm at 6:30 pm #838979yentingyentaParticipanti assume your post was meant to be read sarcastically?
December 27, 2011 7:14 pm at 7:14 pm #838980JotharMembermy posts are sarcastic. I hate smoking.
December 27, 2011 8:28 pm at 8:28 pm #838981oomisParticipantMaybe he meant too emotional or needy, giggly, or flighty. He didn’t say too feminine, he said girly.
December 27, 2011 8:49 pm at 8:49 pm #838982YatzmichMemberOP,
If you write “duz” for “does,” that’s too girly.
December 27, 2011 9:27 pm at 9:27 pm #838983OneOfManyParticipantHaLeVia says, too girly might mean that she actually got insulted when he casually made a rude or nasty comment.
Are you not supposed to get insulted when someone casually makes a nasty comment? How does this make sense?
December 27, 2011 9:40 pm at 9:40 pm #838984JotharMemberI once knew someone who refused to date girls who didn’t have brothers, as they would have these lofty ideas of men from their rabbeim and seforim which would clash with the reality. Maybe that’s what he meant.
December 28, 2011 5:13 pm at 5:13 pm #838985BTGuyParticipantYou have to ask him what he meant? Maybe he misspoke. The implication is he wants someone more boyish. Oy!
December 28, 2011 5:46 pm at 5:46 pm #838986goldenkintMemberThe only one who can explain what he meant is him. Ask for a clarification with a few examples of what”too girly ” is if you really need to know
December 29, 2011 1:58 am at 1:58 am #838987bh18ParticipantI wish my ex husband had told me during dating that I was too girly!!! After we married, he did not want or let me wear anything with flowers, feminine colors, designs, even makeup! He said its too feminine and too much. So yes, if he thinks you’re too girly, thank him for saying it now!
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