Infringing on my freedom of association

How are you is an open ended question, you can be polite and say “fine, thanks” and thats the end of the “conversation” or you can become freindly and say “FINE, AND HOW ARE YOU?!

But you can close it politly. NOT EDITED

i think how are you is used as an expression of hello. she really didn’t care at all how you are doing.

I have always maintained that when service personnel say “how are you?”, they really don’t care – it has just become part of today’s colloquial conversation. I could say this is also true of being asked this by acquaintances, as well. They really don’t want to know. One day I would love to have the nerve to REALLY answer the question, for example “Well, my back is really sore today and they have changed my medication. Also my bank phoned to say they are foreclosing on my mortgage, so we will all be out on the street.” I wonder what the stunned reponse would be or, in fact, if the person had even heard what I said because the expected reply of “just fine thanks”, was not forthcoming. Popa, why don’t you try that one day and see what happens? “Have a nice day.” (another phrase that drives me batty). In fact, there are a few expressions that irritate me. When a waitress calls me “sugar” or “honey” I want to toss the coffee in their faces. Recently I was at a hospital for an IV infusion and they were having a lot of trouble establishing the IV (in fact they never did get it going because after the fifth jab, I called the whole thing off). A very young nurse kept calling me “sweetie” till I finally barked at her “you may call me Jane or you may call me Mrs. Doe, but stop calling me sweetie. I am not your sweetie – you don’t even know me and I am old enough to be your grandmother.” That was the last that I saw of her.

To Popa:

Realize that you are an American Citizen (I am thinking) and you will come across many other citizens. Though you probably are not running for office, it is really not a bad idea to be polite and to smile when someone asks you how you are doing especially when they are about to perform a menial task to make your day get better. So if you want to be either shallow or peevish about how you smile at the rest of the world, that is your decision. I would think that being a light to the world as you are being a Jewish soul, you might want to consider whether your light is full and brilliant or if it is just flickering.

I answer with “Baruch Hashem good,” or something similar. (If you asked me right now I would say, “Baruch Hashem I have a headache.”)

I never ask “how are you,” unless I want to know. So when said friend answers “Baruch Hashem,” I get really upset. THAT’S NOT AN ANSWER. I then have to follow with “Baruch Hashem good or baruch Hashem bad?”

As an aside, I used to have a doctor who was best friends with my boss. One day he called my boss at work, I answered the phone, and of course, he asked, “How are you?” I answered, “Are you asking to be friendly, in which case I’ll say, ‘Fine, thank you,’ or are you asking as my doctor, in which case I’ll tell you the truth?”

You have an opportunity to fulfill the mandate of the Mishna “greet each person with a ” sever panim yafos’ with a nice countenance and you intentionally don’t want to?? Stay at home till you can!!!