Home › Forums › Decaffeinated Coffee › Name Hard to live up to?
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May 18, 2011 9:19 pm at 9:19 pm #596964Sender AvMember
It is said that our name reflects who/ what we are expected to be (i.e. our inner essence). Does anyone find their name hard to live up to? I’ll start: Yes, I do. My gematria of my name equals 613 which makes me feel that I am below expectations of what I can accomplish etc. Anyone else want to make me feel better by telling me they deal with something similar?
May 18, 2011 9:37 pm at 9:37 pm #768118ZeesKiteParticipantIt’s quite easy for me to live up to my name. I just try not to sour!
May 18, 2011 9:37 pm at 9:37 pm #768119yid.periodMemberI think you shouldn’t be so hard on yourself because “you aren’t living up to your name.” First of all, nobody is Chayav in all 613 mitzvot. Secondly, everyone is chayav in all of the mitzvot that are relevant to them, equally. So you’re name doesn’t make you anymore responsible than anybody else (take that as a good or bad thing). With that said, nobody is perfect. Most people are far from it. The only thing you can ask from yourself is to keep trying your hardest, always. Goals are supposed to increase your inspiration and devotion, not depress you into giving up. You’ll get where you’re supposed to be, just keep trying.
This applies to adorable’s thread before also I guess.
Sorry if that was a lot of stream of consciousness; I hope it helps.
May 18, 2011 10:24 pm at 10:24 pm #768120Sender AvMemberThanks. I know I am not chayuv in all 613, it is just that my name makes me feel like what I am chayuv in, I might not be living up to.
May 18, 2011 10:32 pm at 10:32 pm #768121WolfishMusingsParticipantI live up to my name. I make sure to check for fleas and bite a few passers-by every month or so.
The Wolf
May 19, 2011 1:19 am at 1:19 am #768122snapplegrlMemberMy hebrew name is Sara(hope i didnt give myself away..lol) But sometimes i think about Sara Imeinu hinei bohel.. and i should try to act with tznius or not do things that compromise tznius.. i wish i can say i do it a lot.. but sometimes its good to think about the essence of your name and it gives you what to strive for.
May 19, 2011 1:48 am at 1:48 am #768123yossi z.MemberI don’t know that a gematria tells us about the name more than say who the person was named after. Personally I feel it extremely difficult to live up to my name … I was named for the sixth lubavitcher rebbe (yosef yitzchok). Then again we all have to live up to ourselves not who we were named after, what our gematria is, etc.
I don’t remember which pirush it is but in the parsha (sedras vayetze) where yaakov goes to sleep and the malachim are climbing up and down, there is an explanation given that they were looking at a figure of him up in shamayim (who he was supposed to become) and comparing him to who he was then (which he was greater-which would lead us to a discussion of if that was the case then wasn’t he finished his job? But this is the wrong thread for that). I can’t guarantee everything I said about yaakov avinu here as it has been a while since I looked at it but this is what I remember so if anyone can confirm or clear it up it would be much appreciated.
😀 Zuberman! 😀
May 19, 2011 2:17 am at 2:17 am #768124cofeefanMemberthe person i was named after was such an amazing woman i always try to make her proud…. i hope i will….
May 19, 2011 3:35 am at 3:35 am #768125ronrsrMemberin the book Freakonomics: A Rogue Economist Explores the Hidden Side of Everything a 2005 non-fiction book by University of Chicago economist Steven Levitt and New York Times journalist Stephen J. Dubner, there are several chapters devoted to naming. I don’t remember the entire gist, but I remember two stories of names determining destiny, or not.
The first was a girl named “Temptress.” She was a 15-year old girl whose misdeeds landed her in juvenile court due to her ungovernable behavior. Her mother meant to name her “Tempestt” after a favorite actress, but there was a slip between intent and what went on the birth certificate, and the mother admitted to not really knowing what the word ‘temptress’ meant until much later. The judge asked the mother if some of the ungovernable behavior might stem from here name.
The other story involved two brothers from the Lane family of New York. The first one was named “Winner.” Three years later, a younger brother was born and named, “Loser.” He was not so-named because the father who did the naming was displeased with the new baby, but because it had a nice bookend effect.
Loser Lane did in fact succeed. He went to prep school on a scholarship, graduated from Lafayette College in Pennsylvania, and joined the New York Police Department, where he made detective and, eventually, sergeant. Although he never hid his name, many people were uncomfortable using it. To his police colleagues today, he is known as Lou.
And what of his brother? The most noteworthy achievement of Winner Lane, now in his late 40s, is the sheer length of his criminal record: more than 30 arrests for burglary, domestic violence, trespassing, resisting arrest, and other mayhem.
Was it their names that determined their path in life?
Was it her name that sent Temptress down the wrong path, or was it the mother who just didn’t care enough to give her baby a decent name?
May 19, 2011 4:12 am at 4:12 am #768126s2021MemberNo, I relate alot to my name.
May 19, 2011 5:37 am at 5:37 am #768127123bubbyParticipantits sooo hard living up to my name, I mean im only a Teen and im expected to ack like a old mature bubby!!!!!
May 19, 2011 6:19 am at 6:19 am #768128smile66MemberSender Av: Maybe you should look at the 613 in your name in the way that Bnei Yisroel are told to keep the 613 mitzvos… through achdus. Maybe the 613 in your names means that you’re supposed to, on some level or another, help bring people in klal yisroel together, so that one day we’ll all be able to collectively keep all 613 mitzvos. That may be an easier goal to reach. Not to have to keep them all yourself, which is impossible, but to be someone who helps bring the 613 mitzvos about by bringing Jews together.
I feel like if I ever think of my name, it’s not something that gets me down; if anything it gives me chizuk, that I must have something in me that the person who originated my name exemplified and represented. If she had my name and acted a certain way (and she surely lived up to her name), that means I have the potential to in some way be like her. That makes me feel good, not frustrated. No one really knows all the hidden meanings of their name and how specifically it will apply to them in life. Not all the Sara’s or all Moshe’s in the world are alike in some obvious way, and they can actually be complete opposites. That means that there’s obviously a deeper, unseen level to our names that only Hashem understands the manifestation of. I plan on just living my life to the best of my ability, and hopefully somewhere in there I fulfill what Hashem wanted me to fulfill out of my name…
May 19, 2011 6:37 am at 6:37 am #768129hanibParticipanti think it’s a life’s work to live up to one’s name. but, that is the area i’m most trying to do. i’ll let you know when i’m 95 if i succeeded.
May 19, 2011 3:21 pm at 3:21 pm #768130minyan galMemberSometimes it is very difficult to live up to my name which is Tova. I try, I try, I try.
May 19, 2011 4:48 pm at 4:48 pm #768131aries2756ParticipantMy husband and I have the names of a pair of our Holy Avos and Imaos. If you think you have to live up to names try that.
May 19, 2011 4:57 pm at 4:57 pm #768132adorableParticipanthelp I dont have anything special in my name- not named after any imahos…just a grandmother
May 19, 2011 5:38 pm at 5:38 pm #768133smile66Memberaries – lol
adorable – Don’t worry if you feel like your name isn’t really special, it’s not like all everyone can do in their lives is live up to the strict definition of their name. Like I said before, I think each person is supposed to live up to their name in a different way, and we probably wouldn’t even see it if we were doing it. And I’m sure your grandmother didn’t do too bad a job with the name either…
May 19, 2011 8:55 pm at 8:55 pm #768134s2021Member“help I dont have anything special in my name- not named after any imahos…just a grandmother”
I hope my grandkids dont say that about me one day…
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