Wednesday night, December 20, 6th Night of Chanukah
 
I last wrote on Friday December 8th.  Tehilla was then discharged and home.  Dovid was scheduled for his bone flap surgery on that following Monday.
 
B”H there has been continued improvements; they’re both on their way towards what we hope, pray, and trust will be a refuah shelaima, a full and complete recovery.
 
Tehilla is totally functioning in all areas.  Her attention span is not back to her old self and her temperament especially with those closest to her is not yet with her old grace and mature control but she’s on her way.  This is all to be expected and she is improving everyday B”H.  Her recovery has been, thank HaShem remarkable and with these items on the “punch list” we need to realize and be patient that brain injury recovery under normal circumstances can take 6 months to 2 or more years.  Here, only after 2 months, Tehilla is back in school 1/2 day in the morning and doesn’t need nursing, only time for continued healing.  Her Principal notices a striking difference between Monday December 11th, her first day back and this past Friday, the end of her 1st week back in school.  She is continuing her Physical Therapy for her leg and Speech Therapy to continue working on her “Executive skills”  (judgement and decision making) which I think is almost all there.  All I can say is, Thank You HaShem and I thank all who have joined with us in prayer for her and for Dovid.  Prayers for both should please continue until they’re 100%.
 
Last Thursday evening I took Tehilla to see Dovid for her first time.  After a brief visit, since Dovid was at the end of his day and tired, we walked next door to St. Louis University Hospital where Tehilla was airlifted to and stayed for 2 weeks until her discharge to rehab at St. Louis Children’s Hospital.  Her first week was in ICU and her 2nd week was in the step down unit, she was totally disoriented and agitated.  When I walked down the hall to introduce her to her former nurses, many saw me and greeted me with a warm hello and “how’s your daugh….” , then their mouths dropped in surprise and … almost disbelief…..  They gathered around her and said, “this is a miracle”, “this is prayer answered”.  They called the other nurses that cared for Tehilla. The same happened when we visited the ICU next door to the step down unit.  The nurses called the Doctor (Fellow) who was from the Trauma Service who took care of Tehilla.  He was pretty straight forward, unemotional type of person, but when he heard that Tehilla Grunberger was there to visit, he ran up from a lower floor to see her and marveled at her recovery.  She didn’t remember any of them but they all treated her like an old friend. They were so pleased that we came to visit and they were amazed at how well (B”H) she is doing for what is considered a very short time span.  It should be clear to all: Prayer Works and HaShem runs the world!
 
I have been davening that Tehilla and Dovid’s recovery should be a Kiddush HaShem (Sanctification of G-d’s name) in that those who know what they have gone through and how severe their injuries were, will become aware and give thought to the fact that HaShem is present, He hears our prayers, and He is the Master Healer.  I have told Dovid from the beginning when I wasn’t even sure if he could hear me or process what I was saying, that HaShem will give you a refuah shelaima and when you’re older and become a Rav or Rosh Yeshiva, your students will come to you for encouragement and advise, you can tell them how when you were 7 years old you were very sick and HaShem gave you a refuah because of all the tefillos and mitzvos that were done in your merit.  You can be a great encouragement to others who will need this encouragement to daven and trust in HaShem.  You’ll be able to speak to them from experience and as a living miracle of HaShem’s abilities and kindness.
 
I was pleased with the responses and reaction of the nurses and hope that they and everyone who will see Tehilla (and Rafael Dovid) will realize and internalize the presence of HaShem constantly in our lives and our responsibility within this relationship.  So many, most people, throughout time will say “In G-d We Trust”, “we believe in G-d”, will recognize G-d in times of personal miracles but then there is the classic short circuit where people don’t carry out the thought.  What does it mean that I just experienced a miracle which I’m convinced of?  Is there something I’m suppose to do in return? etc… etc….  The truth is that is not surprising at all.  It’s the crux of free choice.  After seeing a miracle or experiencing something which intuitively or openly testifies to HaShem’s hashgacha (Divine Providence)  there inevitably has to be a challenge to maintain the “free choice”.  Is one going to reevaluate their life, lifestyle, former choices and consider or reconsider the implications of what they just experienced, or not?  Will the individual change and commit to a Torah lifestyle which is mandated by the HaShem through the Torah, or compromise?  There has to be the choice and we need to choose to have a relationship with G-d and not do it because we’re compelled or forced into it.  Therefore G-d created in the world this resistance to balance the scale so we can choose it on our own.  How sad it is that so many (including ourselves) conveniently get distracted from these crucial issues losing out on the growth opportunity or the opened window of clarity which could change our lives.
 
Last Monday morning December 11th, Dovid had his bone flap surgery.  It went well and was successful.  His head now looks normal except for all the stitches around his head from the surgery.  He was sent from surgery into the TCU (Transitional Care Unit) and then on Wednesday last week back to the rehab floor.  Last Thursday he was back to aggressive rehab.  His schedule is 9am -12 rehab, nap time from 12-1pm, and more rehab therapies from 1-3.  From 3 till 10pm he has visitors. 2 Girls from Block Yeshiva High School or Bais Yaakov come in shifts from 4-6, 6-8, 8-10 to talk with him and read to him. He usually falls asleep between 8 and 9.  At 10 or 11 pm, every night, someone from the community sleeps in his room to be with him.  The hospital has never seen this sense of community, care, and love.  In the merit of all this care and chesed, in addition to all the tefillos and mitzvos, I hope and pray that this too chalks up merits for Dovid, Tehilla, as well as all the cholei Yisroel who are in need of help and mercy from Above.  Truthfully we are all in constant need of merits.  The physical world in which we live is based on a spiritual system.  All that happens down here, EVERYTHING has a spiritual source.  Just like many wish to have a savings account or a nestegg available for times of material need, so too we need a spiritual savings account filled with merits to be there for us, our families and our communities in times of real need. Those merits are spiritual and can influence the physical as we can see so clearly if we wish to look and see.  Teshuva, tefilla, tsedakah, chesed all create merits especially when it requires mesiras nefesh, self sacrifice. 
 
We don’t have to look far during Chanukah; this is what we’re celebrating.  Miracles happen when there is commitment, conviction and self sacrifice to uphold the precepts of the Torah especially when its integrity is threatened. We can learn from the Maccabees and the need it no less today just under different circumstances.  It may take a miracle to bring back the entire Jewish People but the Maccabees didn’t go into it faint hearted.  They knew it was the right thing to do and even if it looked like a suicide mission to the naked eye, they knew they would win because they trusted in HaShem. 
 
The following thought has been recurring a lot to me over the last 2 months.  I keep saying to myself and others, “I want my kids back”, “we need to get them back”.  This is my priority at this time.  2 of my children are in great need.  It’s constantly on my mind and I’m making efforts to do something about it.  I’m so appreciative when others are helping to get my kids back.  I stop and think, 9 out of 10 of HaShem’s children are disconnected, what would be HaShem’s greatest priory?  How much nachas (pleasure) would HaShem have if the Jewish People would return (do Teshuva), “come back” and reconnect with their heritage and Torah?  How much pleasure would HaShem have if others would assist and get involved with “outreach” because they care, just as we care to bring back someone who’s in danger, and as so many have cared and been involved to help get my kids back.
 
HaShem makes miracles today no less than the miracles we celebrate on Chanukah.  We pray and trust that we’ll see these miracles with Rafael Dovid’s recovery which will be an inspiration to others and increase everyone’s trust and relationship with HaShem.  The extent of his recovery, how far he’ll come, is totally unknown to us, it’s all in HaShem’s hands.
 
Dovid is remembering a lot and speaking a little more each week.  He’s not always speaking coherently.  He answers most basic questions accurately.  He recognizes us immediately when we walk into his room with a “Hi Abba” or “Hi Ema” (and repeats it a few times) but he doesn’t always get other people right the first time.  He’s moving his right hand, arm and leg.  His right hand thrashes a lot.  He is able to control it when told to.  He’s also able to point to something when asked to and sometimes is even able to touch the exact point; other times he tries hard and gets close.  It’s definitely getting better each week.  The thrashing and constant swinging his right arm is a result of the head injury and as the brain heals, the thrashing will subside and become more controlled and normal. 
 
We got the first results of his vision testing which was quite positive.  He has only been seeing through part of each eye.  It was obviously very concerning.  The original diagnosis when he was in ICU the first few weeks did not project a positive prognosis at all.  We’re grateful that his actual eyes are ok and the issues of damage to his optic nerve and the visual pathways back to the part of brain which determines his vision, seems not to be disrupted B”H.  We’re so grateful to HaShem for this and now it’s a matter of time for the damaged areas which are affecting his vision to heal and repair, G-d willing.
 
He has been fed through is “g-tube”, directly to his stomach.  This week they are working with his swallowing and strengthening the muscles affecting the swallow.  There are 25 little muscles that work together!  Amazing.  He has been drooling less which is a sign that he has been swallowing his saliva.  When I ask him to swallow (his saliva), it seems that he swallows.  They are proceeding with extreme caution because in the meanwhile, he is fully nourished, and if he’s not fully capable to swallow, he could aspirate due to lack of full swallowing ability which would be a major setback.
 
Today is 10 weeks from October 11th, the Wednesday evening of Chol HaMoed when the collision took place.  So many people, friends and others who we don’t even know, have shared in this ordeal in many different ways.  We’re humbled and deeply filled with gratitude.  We’re thankful we’re alive and we’re thankful for the miracles we’ve seen and experienced thus far.  Just as every additional night and day of Chanukah was a greater testimony to the miracles of the lights, so too we hope that Tehilla and Dovid’s light, their essence and influence, will continue to glow, and reach the full potential that they were born with. 
 
Brocha and I thank you for your prayers and mitzvos on their behalf, and for being an active partner in their miracles and recovery through your efforts.  Wishing you a freiliche Chanukah!
 
Elazar Grunberger
 
P.S.  Leah arrived several days ago from Israel and Reuvain her Chosson arrived the night before last.  Their engagement party is tomorrow night and we’re planning a February 1st wedding here in St. Louis.  May we only share simchas together!!