By Rabbi Yair Hoffman
The Satmar Rebbe, Rav Aharon Teitelbaum shlita, has taken bold action to help a woman trapped in a difficult marital situation. The Rebbe has ordered a man from another Chassidus, who married a second wife without first granting a divorce to his first wife, to grant her a divorce within 24 hours.
The man, an observant Jew who is not a Satmar Chasid himself but lives in a Chasidic community, married for the first time in his youth and started a family. However, more than a decade ago, the relationship between the two deteriorated and they decided to separate. Despite this, the man has not given his first wife a “get.”
In a case where a husband refuses to grant his wife a get, the woman cannot remarry, making her an “agunah” or “chained wife.” The husband also cannot remarry according to Jewish law, unless he receives a legitimate “exceptional permit” signed by 100 rabbis called a “Heter Me’ah Rabbonim.” The man in this case had previously obtained such a permit and remarried, while his first wife remained trapped in her marital status.
Rav Teitelbaum, the head of Satmar based in Kiryas Joel, New York, has now taken up the cause of the chained woman. In a bold move, he has publicly demanded that the man provide valid documentation of the 100 rabbinical signatures on the permit within 24 hours, or grant a religious divorce to one of his wives.
The Rebbe’s intervention has brought international attention to this complex case. He has used his significant influence and authority within the Chasidic community to try to free the woman from her chained status and allow her to move on with her life.
Rav Teitelbaum’s unwavering commitment to upholding halacha and protecting vulnerable women like this “agunah” demonstrates heroic leadership and concern for the welfare of Klal Yisroel.
The Chezkuni (Bereishis 3:16) cites a Midrash and writes that if someone is betrothed to a woman and leaves her stuck as an agunah, then he is a denier of the World to Come. Consequently, he loses his share in Olam Ha’Ba – the world to come. The Baalei HaTosfos cite the same exposition and come to the very same conclusion. Making an Agunah causes one to lose Olam Habah.
There, of course, the status of the agunah began at the very very beginning of a marriage—upon halachic betrothal. Nonetheless, the idea is the same—these Rishonim hold that the husbands have lost their share in Olam Ha’Bah. Their fate and future no longer lie with Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob and their grandparents and great-grandparents for generations. Rather, the fate of these husbands is with the likes of the evil Bilaam and Gechazi.
But what if it was the woman who caused the marriage to fall apart? Is there then a rationale to hold back the Get? There is a fascinating Chasam Sofer (Nedarim 29) that even in an extreme case where a wife sinned with an extramarital relationship, “Ein lanu le’agein osa—we are not to make her into an agunah.” The Chasam Sofer continues that this is both obvious and clear.
What should our reaction be when we see an Agunah? The Responsa Yeshuas Malko (EH #54) by Rabbi Yisroel Yehoshua Trunk (Poland 1893-1920) writes, “All of Israel is obligated in trying to help such a woman.”
Rav Moshe Shternbuch of the Eida HaChareidis in Jerusalem (Teshuvos v’Hanhagos Vol. V #44) writes regarding someone who is refusing to give a get to his wife, it is “permitted and proper to publicize” that “no one should have anything to do with him.” The Posaik mentioned in the very beginning of this article would qualify this ruling of Rav Shternbuch as applicable only when the husband is not trying to get the spouse to remove false charges, and only when the charges have not been accompanied with corroborating evidence.
The Shulchan Aruch (Even HaEzer 1:11) rules that it is proper to enact laws and stipulations regarding marrying an additional wife (this was according to those that had not adopted the ban of Rabbeinu Gershom on polygamy). The Vilna Gaon explains that the Shulchan Aruch writes this in order to avoid situations which may cause or tempt the husband to make his first wife an agunah.
We can make two observations regarding this explanation of the Vilna Gaon. The first is that the notion of husbands making their wives into Agunos as a means of retaliation is certainly not new. The second observation is that we see clearly that steps should be taken to avoid this tragic reality of Agunos from coming about. It is our communal responsibility.
Rav Moshe Feinstein, zt’l (Igros Moshe YD Vol. IV #15) in a letter to Rabbi Chanina Simcha Posner written in the summer of 1976, writes categorically that no one party has the right to be me’agein the other party for financial purposes. (Me’agein is the verb form of making someone into an agunah.)
Elsewhere, the Shulchan Aruch rules that it is generally forbidden to judge on Shabbos (Orech Chaim 339:1). The Remah adds that even if someone needs to be punished it is forbidden to place him in jail so that he not run away. The Mishnah Berurah (329:14), written by the saintly Chofetz Chaim, rules that this ruling of the Remah does not apply to husbands who are refusing to give their wife a get. He writes that one is allowed to put such a husband in jail over Shabbos so that he will not run away and will thus be present on motzaei Shabbos to give a get to his wife.
Not one of these sources is denying the right of a husband to present his side of the story to a beis din. What these sources all do, however, is demonstrate that the refusal to come to the table and the withholding of a get to inflict psychological harm or pressure to capitulate in other matters is an abominable form of behavior that causes people to lose their share in the World to Come and justifies jailing them on the Sabbath itself.
There are, of course, two sides to every story, and the side of many husbands is the unfair alienation of the father to the children. However, Gedolei HaPoskim have agreed that no matter what, a woman should not be denied a Get if the two have not lived under the same roof for 18 months. We should have Batei Dinim and other resources available to assist in such situations, but not at the expense and chillul Hashem of creating Agunah situations.
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One Response
YWN you just played a part in hurting an inoccent man even more by indiscreetly getting involved. Nobody has to give a Get to a wife that doesnt let him see his children. there is no moral justification. btw this women didnt even want a Get for the last 9 years, she never even asked. She and her father rather wanted no divorce on the premise of hurting her ex husband. They are just on a compaign to a get back at someone, If someone wants a divorce they would have long let the husband see his children ,She doesnt obviously want one.