Reb E, I’m not convinced that everyone can change if they are desiring to be heterosexual. Conversion therapy doesn’t seem to work on a lot of people. One often hears three opinions, or rather two opinions and one heresy. Some say that they can change, and that they’re obligated to, and that their urges are bad. Others say that if they can’t change, they must live celibately and they can contribute to tzorchei tzibur. Then there are apikorsim who say that since they can’t change they should be allowed to do what they want.
I’ve long thought of a different idea. I don’t think fighting feelings helps, as the nature of the mind is to resist such things(i e., “Don’t think about pink elephants”). What works for intrusive thoughts us to let them be, and not engage them either negatively or positively. I believe one can develop an interest in women, perhaps tomboy types. I don’t think Marx is right that there aren’t heterosexual people – there definitely are people who naturally have zero interest in the same gender, and i think that’s the majority of people, as rav moshe writes, the YH isn’t for taavah like it is normally. While they claim not to have any attraction to women, i think it’s precisely because they TRY to be attracted, and their mind resists.