Big issue-please advise

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  • #2097637
    Zaphod Beeblebrox
    Participant

    My roommate thinks he’s a cat. I’m not joking. He just sits around all day in a beam of sunlight kicking around a ball of yarn that we had lying around for some reason. I tried taking him to the doctor, but he refuses to go anywhere but the vet. I’m really worried about him, and besides for that, his off key meowing is making my head hurt.

    I would really appreciate advice on what to do from anyone who may have dealt with something like this. I talked to one doctor and he told me it’s species dysphoria and I should just learn how to deal with it, and to buy home a chew toy. I attempted to follow his advice until I found my roommate suspiciously digging around in a mouse hole.

    To make matters worse, he’s apparently a very picky cat, and if I serve him anything other than fresh salmon he flies into a tantrum and shreds the drapes. Again, please help. He’s currently curled up under his bed and won’t come out because there’s a dog outside our window.

    #2097652
    n0mesorah
    Participant

    Always keep a dog by the window.

    #2097657
    Zaphod Beeblebrox
    Participant

    😂😂😂😂

    #2097676
    mizmor
    Participant

    “My roommate thinks he’s a cat.”

    how racist of you.
    he doesn’t “think” he’s a cat. if he identifies as a cat he is indeed a cat.

    #2097677
    Reb Eliezer
    Participant

    See how he reacts to a mouse.

    #2097693
    ☕️coffee addict
    Participant

    “See how he reacts to a mouse.“

    Or even better show him he’s not a cat by dropping him from a height and he won’t land feet first

    On second thought……

    #2097723
    n0mesorah
    Participant

    Dear Mizmor,

    To what race do cats belong?

    #2097742
    yaakov doe
    Participant

    As long as he uses the litter box remember it could be worse.
    If he’s a Jewish cat he will only eat the salmon and not canned catfood because he keeps kosher.

    #2097744
    Gadolhadorah
    Participant

    “He’s apparently a very picky cat, and if I serve him anything other than fresh salmon he flies into a tantrum”…

    Well, he is really going to freak out since R’ Gavornlik, shlita, just paskined that the tolayim present in virtually all salmon are totallly asur in accordance with the holding of the Shulchan Aruch in Yoreh Deah (84:16). Recent studies have shown that in salmon, the tolayim migrate from the viscera to the flesh and skin. There are still some excellent varieties of dried kitty- kibble with outstanding chassideshe hashgacha that he may learn to love over time versus a painful death from hunger.

    #2097759
    jsocher
    Participant

    Maybe he is a cat. Take him to the pound and let them deal with him.

    #2097792
    yaakov doe
    Participant

    Management just escorted me out of the largest heimish store in Brooklyn when I complained that they didn’t have kitty- kibble with chassideshe hashgacha. They told me not to ever come back again.

    #2097800
    mizmor
    Participant

    “ Dear Mizmor,
    To what race do cats belong?”

    the word racism no longer has anything to with race. we righteous liberal warriors have co-opted that word to apply to any state of action which we don’t approve of.

    where have you been!?

    #2097831
    n0mesorah
    Participant

    Dear Mizmor,

    If that standard applied to this page, then it should be applied to me just for questioning your post.

    #2097868
    Zaphod Beeblebrox
    Participant

    Thank you all for your help. I tried sending him to the pound but they wouldn’t accept him. I wonder why. I haven’t tried dropping him off anything (for obvious reasons), but the situation is rapidly reaching the point where I feel as I may have no other choice. If anyone has an idea that wouldn’t involve murder, I’d love to hear it.

    #2097869
    Zaphod Beeblebrox
    Participant

    Although to be honest I don’t think he would let a silly thing like that convince, because apparently his arms are his feet now as well.

    #2097873
    Zaphod Beeblebrox
    Participant

    Thank you to all that responded. Your support is much appreciated during this difficult time. I tried taking him to the pound but they wouldn’t accept him. I wonder why. They also have dogs there, which I’ve already mentioned is a problem.

    To those who suggested I throw him off something to show him that he won’t land on his feet, as of now I’d prefer not to commit murder, and if I throw him off something low the point may not come across as clearly. However, the situation is rapidly reaching a point where I feel as though I may have no other choice. Besides, apparently his arms are also his legs right now, so I’m not so sure my point would be proven at all. He’s also pretty fat, and to be honest I’m not sure I could lift him.

    Any further suggestions would be most welcome.

    #2097910

    Just don’t take him to CatsKills!

    Most likely he is a regular Katz – Cohen Tzedek.

    #2097938
    Katonti
    Participant

    As someone who suffers from Species Dysphoria, I’m horrified and hurt by all the comments treating this like a joke.

    @Zaphod, your roommate is a cat.
    He’s always been a cat and you should accept him for who he is.
    It was just a few years ago when I realized my true identity as a Warthog.
    It wasn’t easy, but eventually my friends, family, and rebbium began accepting me for who I am.
    And since then, since I’ve assumed my truest identity, I’ve been able to finally feel at peace.

    So accept him, accept him and love him.
    And all of you making jokes, you should know, that Species Dysphoria is very common.
    We’re everywhere.
    We are your friends, your neighbors, bus drivers and accountants.
    We are Meerkats, Warthogs, Pandas and so on.
    Join us and be an ally.

    Katonti

    #2097989
    ☕️coffee addict
    Participant

    “He’s also pretty fat, and to be honest I’m not sure I could lift him.“

    I wonder if he’s rich like most other fat cats

    It would explain the pickiness

    #2098102
    GotAGoodPoint
    Participant

    Just treat him like a human or better still, ignore him. He’ll soon enough discover that he’s become a human again. These things happen!

    #2098375
    Participant
    Participant

    i didn’t ask anyone to prove their identity. i didn’t write anything about korbonos chas vechalila, i didn’t write anything tedious about video cameras, either. I wrote the most harmless, easiest post to read, and it doesn’t go through. go figure.

    It was in spam. Next time try asking instead of accusing.

    #2099670
    Zaphod Beeblebrox
    Participant

    K he just shredded my couch. Seriously people I need solutions!

    #2099697
    moishekapoieh
    Participant

    How do you know he s male? If it is a female, how can you dorm with it?
    If he is a male, why not just marry him, and you could introduce him as “my husband” . I see it all the time on t.v. nowadays. Moshiach better comes soon.

    #2099694
    vustits420
    Participant

    What we really need to figure out is who the mouse in the room is. Aside from that I would suggest getting a ball of yarn and a later… Cats love yarn & lasers.

    #2099689

    this is a CATastrophe!

    If he destroyed your couch, you can still sue him in Beis Din. Beis din will then have to assert whether he is an Adam or a Behama (and who the responsible owner is who will pay for shen & regel then).

    I am not sure what the beis din going to say if they are given both a bris certificate and a vet immunization record.

    #2099817
    vustits420
    Participant

    @Always_Ask_Questions

    It’s a Sofek. It’s considered a Adam with a Muum of an animal in its brain. In such a case the cat can say it suffers from borderline species personality Dysphoria Disorder (mentally unstable). In such a case the cat would be Patur altz Shogeg bec it has no control.

    #2099823
    vustits420
    Participant

    While we are on topic, if the cat kills B’mezid is it chayuv misa? Also by Shogeg does it go to galus?

    #2099838

    He might be shogeg when he is a cat, but maybe he was mazid in becoming a cat?! Or at least shogeq karov l’mazid! He shold have guarded himself from thinking he is cat before it became too late.

    #2099906
    Zaphod Beeblebrox
    Participant

    you can say that mental illness is an oines, so great hes patur. My couch is still gone. How do I convince him that he’s not a cat?

    #2099908
    Katonti
    Participant

    Most Cats use They/Them, Cat-Self Pronouns.
    The usage of He/Him in reference to this cat is triggering.

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