Dear YWN,

It seems like so much time and effort is spent these days trying to dictate to others what, where and how they should live their lives or conduct themselves. Does anyone think dictating to others actually works? Stop and think for a second, when was the last time someone dictated something to you and you changed your behavior based on what they said? On the flip side, you can probably more easily remember an incident, situation or behavior that you observed, were moved by and now choose to emulate.

I am not saying that the items that people choose to get upset about are not important. Tznius, the Internet, kashrus, are all important issues that should be addressed, but does anyone think that somehow by yelling or writing about it in a derogatory way, people will suddenly change their behaviors? WHAT ABOUT IF YOU WRITE IN CAPITAL LETTERS? Will that get people to suddenly decide to transform? We all do our best learning through observation, we learn by example. If you are really concerned with the kashrus or tznius be more medakdek in your own keeping of these important mitzvos and others will learn from you. They definitely won’t change their behaviors if you yell at them, hang up signs or create Kol Korehs to attack their behavior. If anything this only incites even more rebellious behavior.

Bottom line: If you are really sincere in your desire to improve Klal Yisrael all you need to do is focus on yourself, others will follow.  If your sincerity is based on some need to vent or create an uproar then that is all you will succeed at, creating an uproar.

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The views expressed in this column reflect the opinions of the individual writers and do not necessarily reflect the views of Yeshiva World News LLC. These individual opinions are also in no way meant as a P’sak Halacha or Hashkafa. As with all matters, be sure to consult with a Rov with all questions.