” Whatever YOU and some of the bochur’s family and friends may think about his virtues are irrelevant. It is only HER standards that count, after she considers the views of all those she trusts.”
Well you know what Dorah- next time you complain about a bochir rejecting a girl especially based on how she looks, remember it’s HIS standards that count. What you think of that girl means nothing. Especially since she won’t suddenly change to become beautiful. But a guy on the other hand can become a millionaire the next day so if anything, most reasons that women have are so senseless because they base mostly on money to define the person. I’m sure even if the guy isn’t such a good guy but leaves a money trail everywhere he goes,”HER” standards will suddenly drop by a longshot so let’s not kid ourselves. Suddenly midos, and personality won’t matter so much. Everything is great!
And if you have any problem with a guy not being able to or wanting to force himself to marry somoen he isn’t attracted to, then I suggest you take a course to rewire your perception of how things work.