RY23, the way the Halacha works is if, say, Chaim decides marriage is not for him, Beis Din then goes and finds a girl who is willing to marry him. So they speak to Shaindel and she tells them that she’s game to marring Chaim. Beis Din goes back to Chaim and say, “Reb Chaim next month you’ll be marrying Shaindel. Be ready cause you have no choice.”
A month later they marry the lucky couple.