Reply To: People Without a Rov

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benignuman
Participant

Joseph,
There are some basic things in parenting that are black and white, but those are few and there wouldn’t be a reason to ask about them because the answer is obvious. For the vast bulk of parenting (after the basics are covered) there are just shades of grey, no right answers and no wrong answers, and approaches should be very child specific. If both parents agree, they won’t have a shaila and then there is no reason to go to a Rav. Only if the parents disagree or are uncertain, does going to a Rav or a chinuch expert make sense. But even then, the parents in the way they frame the question greatly influence the rabbinic response because the Rav does not have independent knowledge of the child and his needs.

On the issue of non-halachic questions. Where to take a job has halachic aspects to it, but those aren’t usually the sort of questions that you would need to ask a rabbi. For example, let’s say you are faced with a choice between a job in area where there is kosher food and an area where there is not. A person needs to work out which location is better economically (and for waist sizes) and kosher food is a factor in that, but he doesn’t need the Rav to tell him not to eat at a non-kosher restaurant. He knows that.