Perhaps its time to place less empahasis on shiduchim and focus more on allowing our young men and women to meet and get to know one another without all the stress and pressures of the current system where parents, grandparents, family and friends create a sense of near-hysteria if a date for kiddushin is not fixed within a short time of the first date. There is no “shidduch crisis”; there is cultural crisis where we push marriage on children not ready of marriage and make them feel like damaged goods (especially the girls) if they c’v reach the age of 20 w/o a chooson and baby carriage. In the context of young men and women with some physical illness or emotional disability, they have every obligation to be transparent as to their condition, even if it means taking longer to find their beschert. To do otherwise is deceitful and more likely than not to result in a breakup of the marriage or serious marital disfunction.
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