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How do you say asher yatzar (or other brachos) when you are in public?
For example, if you are at work and you need to say asher yatzar or a bracha on thunder/ lightning, how would you do it? Would you cover your mouth with your hand? Would you pick up the telephone and pretend that you are talking on the phone?
Or would you just say it normally and not care about the stares of the goyim?
Since muslims throw down a carpet and pray anywhere so can we especially for short Brochos that you are referring to.
Most of us manage to find a “private” place, even when in “public” to say barachos. I don’t know many frum yidden who would march out of a public bathroom at any airport or shopping mall and start shuttling back and forth with kavanah and do a loud, vocal rendition of “asher yatzar” using a nigun attributed to his rebbe. Its almost always possible, even in public, to find a corner spot or behind a column etc. to make a baracha, whatever the circumstances, without calling a lot of attention to oneself.
Why should you be embarrassed to proudly and openly act like a Yid In public and wear your Judaism on your sleeve??
I’m not suggesting that you violate the rules of the library or wherever you are if they have a rule against loud talking. Then go outside and say you tefilos at your full kavana and loudness in public without being embarrassed.
Yes, the Chasidim and Litvaks wear their full Yiddushe levush to work, whether a black hat every day, shtreimal on chol hamoed, bekeshe/lange rekel every day, etc. and make their brochos normally without being embarrassed to do so.
One time I was offered something at work that was cholov stam, and the lady showed me the OU-D and said, ‘See? It’s kosher. You can eat it.” How does one explain himself out of such a situation?
Explain that it is kosher, but there are different standards for kosher, and you only eat dairy products where the milking was watched by an observant Jew.
As a matter of tzinius, we don’t seek to call attention to ourselves in a public venue in any aspect of our haskafah. At the same time, we don’t need to “hide” either if the occasion arises for making a baracha or any other mitzvah. The point is to use common sense and “modesty” in all aspects of our lives. B’H, we live today, for the most part, where we have nothing to fear from the free and open exercise of our religion.
Mik5: on the candy issue you can say things like:
1. I had meat for lunch and I don’t eat dairy after meat.
2. I don’t like that candy.
3. I am watching my weight.
4. I appreciate it but I am not hungry right now.“If one just said the words Baruch ata Hashem Elokeinu Melech Haolam (e.g., of asher yatzar) and there is a goy who asks you a question, what should you do? (It happened to me one time but I had only said Baruch ata Hashem so I quickly ended off with lamdeini chukecha.)”
What about smiling and holding up your hand, as if to say “please wait,” just as you might do if you were in the middle of a conversation with another person?
One time I was offered something at work that was cholov stam, and the lady showed me the OU-D and said, ‘See? It’s kosher. You can eat it.” How does one explain himself out of such a situation?
Say, “I’m fleishig.” She’ll understand.
For the OP, I totally understand the struggle; I find benching to be the hardest, but there’s no heter to just not say brachas. In fact, the Misnah Berura says you should be more brazen with your mitzvos around secular society and more humble and kept to yourself around fellow Jews. I’m not calling you out for the situation you described as I think 90%+ of the frum world also gets it backwards.
That’s all I’m advocating. We should all adhere to the Mishna Brura.
I frequently get customers who I think are talking to me only to find out they are on their bluetooth.
Mik5, I feel I have to mention this. Why do you think videos of Rebbes making brochos on sefiras haomer are amusing?! It sounds disrespectful, which I’m sure it wasn’t. I just want to understand. Personally I find it inspiring.
Maybe if you made brochos with half that haslahavus, people wouldn’t interrupt you, and understand that you are ‘talking’ to a Higher Authority.
Not ashamed to have arteries, but I don’t go around shoving them in your face.
regarding levush, tzitzis, brachos and i’ll add using a yiddish name to the list.
If someone can show up to work with nose rings, tatoos, a hijab or a name like shaniqua, then obviously jewish attire, making a bracha at your desk (not sure about out loud, since you dont expect the goy to say amen) a yarmulka or a jewish name should be perfectly normal, acceptable and not out of place.
Making a loud brocha isn’t only for when there’s a Yid within earshot to say Amen.
Goyim eat meat for breakfast.
You remember the story in the Gemora of the Amora in middle of shemone esrei when the king greeted him?
“(Could be hard for a goy to pronounce).”
Therefore? If you are expected to deal with Shaniqua, Ramparparinder, Toupac and Xio Liu then there is no reason to be concerned with Yechezkel or Yerachmiel.
I dont know your circumstances, but, walk in implies you have an office. If bentching, shut the door. Otherwise, ask you Rav.
“What if the boss walks in, with an entourage of chashuve people (goyim), …”
If I had known when I was younger what I know now, I would have made it a top priority to start my own business and be my own boss, instead of having to work for someone else.
I bentch from a siddur so if someone comes into my office they see I am praying and either wait or they leave and come back in 5 minutes.
As for the candy….you can say I just had breakfast and I am not hungry. BTW, many chassidim still make a fleishigs seuda for a morning bris.
As for names….all my children have their hebrew names on their birth certificates.
Mik, at this point these are legitimate shailos, not philosophical discussion items. There are times throughout davening where it is mutar to interrupt to prevent a financial loss. The fact that such halachah exists, proves that we are NOT to just make it up as we go and cut out whatever part of Torah makes our working lives difficult.
Seriously!? Davening in public is a tremendous kiddish hashem! It says “וראו כל עם הערת כי שם ה׳ נקרא עליך וירא מימיך”
“And all the nations (goyim) will say that HaShem’s name is upon you (tefillin) and they will fear you.
The previos Lubavitcher rebbe put on tefillin in jail behind the back of the Russian officers who clearly told him it was strictly forbidden. When the officer turned around and noticed this, he shoved the rebbe down the staircase and gave him a sharp kick. While he was on the floor at the bottom of the staircase, bleeding from head to toe, he continued davening shema!Have we now invented some chumrah against eating fleishig for breakfast….leftover Chulent on Sunday morning…yummm
I’ve been to a bris in the morning where the seudah was fleishig.
Shudder.
There are several hotel restaurants in EY with hashgacha where one can order an off-menu fleishig dish for breakfast that is served from the regular (dinner) kitchen with all the proper precautions; the general preference NOT to serve fleishig is simply the logistics of offering both milchig and fleishig meals concurrently and the likelihood that the wait staff mixing up dishes, utensils, etc. obviously, if one is grabbing his/her own breakfast at home, these are not concerns as would be the case in a commercial setting.
Edited
mik5,
For example, if you are at work and you need to say asher yatzar or a bracha on thunder/ lightning, how would you do it? Would you cover your mouth with your hand? Would you pick up the telephone and pretend that you are talking on the phone?
There is a middle ground between the two extremes of acting embarrassed to do a mitzva and doing the mitzva in a way that is disruptive to the environment you are in. Asher yatzar is, for me, the “toughest” to do in public, but I will pause outside of the bathroom and say it quietly. If someone looks at me quizzically, I will politely smile and hold up my hands. Most people are smart enough to put two and two together – the kippa and tzitzis, doing something unfamiliar, he must be doing a “Jewish thing”). As for bircas hamazon, I agree with iacisrmma – it is extremely helpful to look in a bentcher while bentching. This lets passers by know that you are praying. Have you never put on tefillin in public?
mik5,
One time I was offered something at work that was cholov stam, and the lady showed me the OU-D and said, ‘See? It’s kosher. You can eat it.” How does one explain himself out of such a situation? Should I claim to be lactose intolerant? But on a different day they will see me eating my cholov Yisroel yogurt!
It doesn’t have to be complicated; just be super nice and show gratitude. Smile, and say, “oh, no thank you, but I really appreciate how thoughtful you are for finding this!” If she went through a lot of trouble to get it, or she’s likely to do it again, then you probably should politely and concisely explain your kashrus standards.
If one just said the words Baruch ata Hashem Elokeinu Melech Haolam (e.g., of asher yatzar) and there is a goy who asks you a question, what should you do? (It happened to me one time but I had only said Baruch ata Hashem so I quickly ended off with lamdeini chukecha.)
Smile and hold up a finger, finish the bracha, then apologize and explain that you were making a blessing. If they ask what the blessing was about, you can say that Jews make many blessings throughout the day for various reasons, and that this one was thanking G-d for your body and health.
Some gentiles also have a grace after meals so you can just tell them the truth. The same goes for other berachot. However, one should be loud about, even in one’s home. People who do that imply that they think that Hashem is hard of hearing c”v (Berachot 24b).
All these comments about the volumetric levels of asher yatzar etc. presume the individual has a modicum of common sense and situational awareness such that one is not disruptive of others or otherwise draw attention to himself unnecessarily. If you are on an airplane, it would be grossly inappropriate to return to one’s seat from the lav and then perform a very loud rendition of asher yatzar so that all your fellow passengers know you have successfully performed some bodily functions. Likewise, in a nice restaurant, you wouldn’t disrupt the dining of others nearby by being unnecessarily loud in a baracha or birchas ha’mazon (whereas in a Pizza shop you might not be so worried about adding to the already high decibel level).
If you are concerned about being interuppted during asher yatzar. go quickly back to your desk, pick up the phone like you have a call and sau the bracha. Unless your boss/coworker is a complete dolt, they wont interrupt.
“If such a situation already arose, it is too late to ask a rav.”
No it isnt. It can happen again.” Anyway, I don’t need to ask a rav, even if such a situation arose, because the halacha is clear that one may not speak during bentching.”
So, why are you asking us here?
Mik, please cite your source for saying berachot loudly (more than enough for someone to ear so he can say “Amen” – and BTW, if a gentile says a blessing to Gd a Jew must answer “Amen” (Rema OC 215:2 and see http://www.hebrewbooks.org/pdfpager.aspx?pgnum=74&req=1809&st= for a different opinion ). It could be that as bnei Noach are commanded to believe in Hashem, at least to become chassidei Umot Haolam if one knows that the gentile will answer “Amen” it might be could to say it so that he can hear it after explaining it (use your common sense – it is the fifth section of the SA).
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