Lakewood

Lakewood is kuloy Torah.

rebshidduch- you’re right, there are just so many places to shop and eat here. Was wondering what kind of place you’re looking for.

Re women’s clothing, as you said there is Junee’s. Right around the corner is probably the biggest clothing store, Brooklyn South West – it can get very busy there. Your best bet is to go on a weekday morning.
Girls on Glen is nice, as is Periwinkle.

Re food, Entree is my fave by far. Nice elegant affordable meat restaurant.
Ottimo is an upper scale dairy restaurant. It’s in the same shopping plaza as Junee.
Pizzano and Circa are both “nicer” pizza stores.
Four Corners Bagels has three locations, great food and even better iced coffee slush if you’re in to that kind of thing.

Let me know if you need any other recommendations or addresses. Been living here a while…

Supermarkets: Gourmet Glatt (where Shoprite used to be on Rt. 9); Season’s on Cedar Bridge Ave.;

Yapchik and Carlos and Gabbys are both excellent restaurants. Also, they have Sprinkles there in the same shopping center as Gourmet Glatt

Yapchik and Carlos and Gabbys are both excellent restaurants

Carlos and Gabby closed. There is a new dairy place there, haven’t tried it (yet).

Warning for anyone posting on this thread: Please note that it is assur according to halacha to say anything negative about any stores or products, etc. (no one has so far, B”H, just want to make sure that no one does, because not everyone is aware of that halacha).

It’s not that simple. For example, if someone has a terrible dog allergy and a clothing store sells clothing made from dog hair, you have to warn them or they could get a severe reaction.

RY – while it is true that most things are permissible when said under certain conditions, I don’t think your example is the best example since it is not negative in any case.

I would think that a better example would be if someone asked you if the clothing in a certain store is good quality or if they asked you which of the ice cream places in Lakewood has better ice cream, etc, and since it is l’toeles you may be allowed to respond (although it may not be so simple, so one should ask first).

The problem in this case is that since it’s a public setting, even if it’s l’toeles to tell Rebshidduch something, it would still be assur to post it online.

Clothing made from dog hair would be seen as a negative by some people.

LU, bad businessmen, contractors, store owners etc all hide behind accusations of lashon harah to rip off customers.
Again, you never answered where you received your Smicha so please refrain from issuing blanket psaks assuring things based on your opinion

The Mitzvah of הוכח תוכיח applies to all Jews, not just ones with semicha. It is incumbent upon women as well as men, even though women can’t get semicha (which has no halachic meaning nowadays in any case and is not necessarily an accurate reflection of a person’s knowledge, even if the person is a male person. The lack of semicha certainly reflects nothing about a female’s knowledge, so asking her where she received her semicha is rather absurd).

Again, you never answered where you received your Smicha so please refrain from issuing blanket psaks assuring things based on your opinion

It would seem fair to ask you where you got your semicha from to pasken that LU shouldn’t express her opinion.

Why?

1. According to halacha, you are not allowed to say something negative about a store or its products. Bli neder, I will try to find you the precise source if I have a chance tonight.

2. I don’t know Yiddish.

3. I am not sure of the answer to your specific questions. I would assume it depends if there is something in your statement which can reflect negatively on one of the stores in question and can potentially cause them to lose business. I don’t see how the second example can possibly be loshon hora especially if you make it clear that you didn’t visit the other stores.
I would think that the first example might constitute loshon hora, so I would ask a sheilah.

Again, keep in mind that we are discussing writing something in a public forum which is very different from giving advice to a friend privately.
When in doubt, asking a sheilah is always best. I think that it is also a good idea to think about how you would feel if it were your store (granted that aitzah might not work for everyone, since not everyone is the same).

4. When I find the sources, they may discuss similar scenarios and answer these questions.

5. Ask a sheilah.

LB – not sure what your point is. Can you clarify?

btw, semicha doesn’t have anything whatsoever to do with this discussion as I already pointed out. For one thing, all Jews are required to keep halacha whether they have semicha or not.

For another, to the best of my knowledge, having semicha today has no real halachic ramifications. It is possible for someone to have semicha and be an ignoramus, and it is possible for someone to not have semicha and be the Gadol Hador.

Generally speaking, the more Torahdik a person is and the more Torahdik the society, the less they care about titles and “degrees” and the more they care about a person’s Yiras Shamayim and limud Torah.

Thanks LB! 🙂

You’re definitely right about the last part!!!

But if I don’t tell him, I cause the buyer a hefsed because he’ll spend more than he needs to.

Was the quote from “A Lesson a Day” referring to posting online?

Besides, a difference in price on the same product is objective. Why wouldn’t it be l’toeles for everyone reading it?

Your “tzu shtel” between the case discussed in the sefer and that being discussed here doesn’t work.

The “reason” you stated earlier shouldn’t apply to prices, as I said, and you didn’t respond to.

Anyway prices change. So it’s unfair to publicize that X retailer’s Something is less than Y retailer’s Something.

Tomorrow it could be the opposite. Or the store has other incentives anyway that would actually make the buyer’s overall purchase less than the retailer who supposedly had a lower sale price on the item.

It’s advertising here in a sense and making comparisons doesn’t give a fair representation to the store. This isn’t Yelp.

derech agav, I have not been back to that thread (“I think I spoke l”h”) since I posted, but I had noticed that you and LB and RebYidd had posted so I checked your profiles to see what you had posted.

I have been wanting to thank you for understanding and explaining what I wrote. Also, I wanted to tell you that I understand your point, and I would probably agree with you in most similar cases, but there were reasons why I thought this case was different. I could be wrong – I’m really not sure – I can see either way.

I think my goal was attained (that LB should understand things a certain way which I think she did). If I had known that my words would be twisted to sound like feminism and possibly create a chillul Hashem, I might have phrased things differently (although that might have been offset by my concern for LB – I’m not sure).

Also, regarding prices, it’s not simply an objective fact – you are making a point of pointing out that the products in one store are more expensive which will discourage the shopper from shopping there. If you hadn’t pointed it out, she might not have cared enough to look into it. It’s possible that she is someone for whom money is not such an issue, so there was no (halachic) reason to point it out to her.

Furthermore, one of the conditions of toeles is that you have to say things as unnegatively as possible and mitigate the bad by saying any positive things you can. Presumably, if you are telling someone that the merchandise in Store A is more expensive than the merchandise in store B, then you would also have to let them know that it is better quality if it is relevant to the person you are speaking to.

But let’s say you are speaking to Shira who doesn’t know and doesn’t care about quality. All that matters to her is the price. But once you mention that the merchandise in Store A is not as good quality as the merchandise in store B, she will get nervous and think she has to buy in Store B, even though for her it would have made sense to save money and shop in store A. So you have just spoken l’H about Store B for no reason. (and maybe caused shalom bayis problems when her husband gets mad at her for spending money they don’t have).

On the other hand, Tova doesn’t really need to know which is less expensive – she needs to know which is better quality, so there was no reason to point out to her that Store A is cheaper. All she needed to know was that Store B is better quality. But if you tell her that Store A is cheaper without mentioning that Store B has better merchandise, then she will feel she has to shop in Store A. Since for her the quality of the merchandise is what matters and not the price, it was l”h to specifically point out to her that Store A is cheaper. And now she will have shalom bayis problems because her husband would have preferred that she buy the better quality merchandise.

If I had known that my words would be twisted to sound like feminism and possibly create a chillul Hashem, I might have phrased things differently

My issue had nothing to do with feminism. It had to do with stating something definitively when you don’t have all relevant​information, even if you think you might know enough. Fortunately, no harm was done, because LB didn’t take your words as definitive, but don’t count on that in all cases.