Yekke2:
The purpose of this thread is to discuss whether: (A) Should you be expressing your love, or should your reactions be stronger to the point of anger, and suppress the love you feel towards your son; (B) Are you supposed to be feeling the love at all; if we would consider him a Rasha, may you love your son who is a Rasha.
I know this sounds very cold and unfeeling, and I’m sure most parents here will say that this post can only be written by someone who has never been a parent, but I’m wondering what the Torah position is when we think about it rationally, leaving our emotions aside.
As I attempted to explain in my previous post, I believe that there is a difference in how we are supposed to treat a מומר לתיאבון and a מומר להכעיס. I think the Haggadah is referring to a מומר להכעיס, who is out to scorn and attack Yiddishkeit. Him we must respond sharply to, so as to blunt the influence that he may have on others. But I don’t think this applies to a מומר לתיאבון. To him we should make it clear that while we do not support or condone his actions, we do love him dearly, and therefore we hope that he returns to the lifestyle that we believe is truly best for him.